AsylumBitch said:
Didn't mean to sound quite like a bitch there, so let me add...
If you love this man, then you both need to get your shit together NOW. If you want any information on this subject, please email me. I have lots of rescources. A marriage is not something you can take for granted. It doesn't matter how long you have been together, everyone needs to feel loved, wanted and needed. Assuming your spouse just "knows" you love him is not enough. You both need to reassure each other of this.
But, I would be willing to make a small wager that he is either having a physical affair or at the very least an emotional affair with someone else. It's up to you to decide what to do with what is obviously a crisis in your life.
Look through this list and see if there is anything you can pick out:
# Secretive phone calls
# Unreachable by phone
# Unexplained numbers on phone bill
# If you call their cell phone and get the call waiting beep...they say they weren't using the phone.
# Never leaves the house without their cell phone/pager
# Hang up calls or someone always saying they've got the wrong number when you answer
# Hiding cell phone or pager
# Strange numbers on pager ( could be codes)
# Hiding cell phone/home phone bills/credit card statements
# Phone bills changed from detailed to normal
# Acting different( short tempered, distant, defensive, etc.)
# Neglecting chores at home
# Picking fights over trivial things in order to get you to leave the house, or so they can leave the house
# Accusing YOU of cheating
# Withdrawing from you/family/friends
# Pointing out YOUR flaws
# Telling you that you'll talk about your relationship concerns when it's more "convenient"
# Little input into future plans with you
# Telling you your concerns about the relationship are "all in your head"
# Avoid any conversation with you other than basics ( "when's dinner", etc.)
# The " I love you, but I’m not IN love with you " talk
# New interest in exercise/diet
# More time at the gym
# Sleeping ALOT
# New cologne/perfume
# New wardrobe
# Suddenly carrying breath fresheners( gum, mints, etc.) with them constantly
# New password protection on computer
# Secret e-mail accounts
# Up on computer to all hours
# Closing dialogue windows on the computer when you walk into the room
# Erasing computer history after every use
# Unexplained purchases on credit card
# ATM withdrawals at unusual locations
# Extra mileage on the car
# Errands that should take 1/2 hour take much longer
# Claims to do things they've never done before ( shop, etc.)
# Buying expensive flowers or gifts for no reason ( if they've not done that before)
# Getting a detailed daily itinerary from you so you won't cross paths
# Leaves early for work or comes home late more
# Claims to work overtime, yet no overtime on checks
# Mentioning a "friend" but never introducing you
# Too many visits to "friends"
# The he's/she's just a friend story
# Lying about where they've been or whom they are with
# Coming home late saying they " just lost track of time"
# Regular friends to both of you acting weird or embarrassed around you
# Offers to go to the store when they usually wouldn't
# Sends you to the store when they could easily go themselves
# Unknown cigarette butts in ashtrays
# Passenger seat position changes
# Changes in sexual behavior with you (may be more or less frequency) or different techniques
# Hiding Viagra
# Hiding condoms
Most of that is hogwash. I never cheated on my girl, and I've said/did a lot of those things:
# Unreachable by phone - I'm very busy, but my personal assistant gets all the calls
# Unexplained numbers on phone bill - I personally don't know 90% of the numbers on the bill as I speak to so many people
# If you call their cell phone and get the call waiting beep...they say they weren't using the phone. - my cell has broken a number of times
# Never leaves the house without their cell phone/pager - I can't. I have to be reachable 24 hours a day.
# Hang up calls or someone always saying they've got the wrong number when you answer - I always get wrong number calls on all my phones every day
# Acting different( short tempered, distant, defensive, etc.) - numerous other reasons for that. Certainly not cheating.
# Neglecting chores at home - busy, tired from work
# Picking fights over trivial things in order to get you to leave the house, or so they can leave the house - again, numerous other reasons for that and cheating is not one of them.
# Withdrawing from you/family/friends - stress
# Pointing out YOUR flaws - I'm honest. I point the flaws of everyone, but she knows that when I praise her or compliment her (most of the day every day) it's real and sincere.
# Telling you that you'll talk about your relationship concerns when it's more "convenient" - yes, if I am in the middle of an important meeting
# Telling you your concerns about the relationship are "all in your head" - of course, if there is nothing wrong, and I am just simply stressed regarding numerous matters, I could seem a bit distant sometimes as I am in my own thoughts. Doesn't meant that I am cheating.
# The " I love you, but I’m not IN love with you " talk - I said that to a girl once. We just simply grew apart and we were together because it was convenient. I certainly wasn't cheating on her.
# New interest in exercise/diet - maybe I am just concetrating on it more now since I am thinking about a comp, or maybe I have more interest in my cars since I am about to buy a new one, or maybe I have more interest in business since I am starting a new company, etc, etc
# More time at the gym - I could just be gettin ready for another comp
# Sleeping ALOT - I am tired!
# New cologne/perfume - I wanted a change 'cause I got bored of the old one.
# New wardrobe - again, I got bored of my clothes or I simply outgrew them.
# Suddenly carrying breath fresheners( gum, mints, etc.) with them constantly - I am eating a lot of garlic lately
# New password protection on computer - I change the passwords security on computers every few days as standard procedure
# Up on computer to all hours - yeah, it's called work - to earn a living!
# Closing dialogue windows on the computer when you walk into the room - I am looking at porn, or looking to buy her another car, or buy her more jewelry or tickets to the opera as a surprise!
# Erasing computer history after every use - I do that all the time as standard procedure for safety reasons
# Unexplained purchases on credit card - I don't know holf of the purchases on the credit cards - I have over $80k limits and they get used monthly
# ATM withdrawals at unusual locations - I travel a lot
# Extra mileage on the car - I travel a lot
# Errands that should take 1/2 hour take much longer - If I am interupted by constant phone calls
# Claims to do things they've never done before ( shop, etc.) - I was trying new experiences
# Buying expensive flowers or gifts for no reason ( if they've not done that before) - I always do that
# Leaves early for work or comes home late more - I have a lot of work to do
# Claims to work overtime, yet no overtime on checks - I don't get paid by the hour
# Mentioning a "friend" but never introducing you - I have lots of those- they are are all work related and I don't like them on a personal level so Iw oudl certainly not lower my girl so much as to introduce her to these people
# Too many visits to "friends" - It's called work - smooching with people to get new contracts signed and deals set up
# Lying about where they've been or whom they are with - maybe I'm organising her a surprise which obviously I don't want her to find out about
# Coming home late saying they " just lost track of time" - happens all the time 'cause I am so busy
# Offers to go to the store when they usually wouldn't - I am being nice
# Sends you to the store when they could easily go themselves - I'm tired or really busy
# Passenger seat position changes - I always have lots of different people in my cars
# Changes in sexual behavior with you (may be more or less frequency) or different techniques - I/we like to experiment a lot so yes different stuff is the norm
# Hiding condoms - I don't want the cleaner to see them
Like I said, most of that is just garbage which will get a lot of people paranoid and will start trouble in their fine relationships for no reason at all.
.gif "IP Gear")
Maybe it is the website I'm on?
