Wife of 4 years doesn't respect one simple but big request I have

[little slice]

Shes changed...no respect

Then a switch flipped and she does not care whatsoever about her cussing. v

I sound like a broken record but...



-women marry men expecting them to change, but they don't

-men marry women expecting them not to change, but they do



sorry for your circumstances bro, best of luck

 

[HUNTHIKELIFT]

Is there anything that she has mentioned to you that she dislikes, but you've also been reluctant to change? If so, maybe you can come up with a solution by compromising.

I honestly am not sure what I do that really displeases her. She knew going into the marriage that family first; my hobbies hunting and hiking takes 2 weeks out of the year that I do with my bro. On the homefront Im laid back and my gym is in my garage and I don't go out to bars anything. '

THAT IS SOMETHING I FORGOT TO MENTION.... Her Ex...He had MULTIPLE affairs over their 15 years of marriage. Matter of fact she said she knows of 6 of them! The reason she stayed with him and forgave him was for the kids. Also the reason she allowed him to control the marriage. SHe thought that it would make him happy and grounded. Didn't happen.
Maybe shes afraid of after the two years shes happy and waiting for the other shoe to drop and so shes playing the tough role because she thinks Im going to act like her Ex...hell I don't know...

 

[HUNTHIKELIFT]

i was gonna say the same thing ,do that then she will be afraid to say it ,never knowing when your taping her lol, or start using worse words like cocksucker and the king word to women cunt ,start saying it, i bet she dont use those 2 words

Video would send her over the edge and she would leave...which I guess that wouldnt be a bad thing if shes talking like that in front of the kids. I'm not sure if she would leave for good though if I posted it...no she would divorce me if I posted it on FB.

 

[HUNTHIKELIFT]

:banghead:

???

 

[techstep]

I just read an article on fixed vs growth mindset (in relationships) I think she just needs to give a shit about you both. 15 years is a long mistake. She might be seriously traumatized.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[HUNTHIKELIFT]

My Father said the very same thing today...but the disrespect is not understood. Being afraid of being controlled is another.

 

[OuchThatHurts]

slit her fucking throat

No more of this kind of talk, please. This forum is for healing and mending - not breaking. Sometimes you need to humble yourself. Foul language can be anger or habit or both. Other times a person feels that saying, "Buy some fucking bread", will have more impact then saying, "Buy some bread."

This could be a sign that she feels either at home, or work, or wherever, she's not being heard. Remember, she has had the job of becoming part of the family you already have. She may need attention - good or bad.

I don't know the sides of the story but you can figure this out with some thought and calm communication with her.

It's just this simple: If you love her, you'll work at it until it's fixed and take the risk of having a happy family. Or you can leave her. That's it.