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Any bros on here plan to never have kids?

SoFocused

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Oct 16, 2011
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Marriage is def not for me, I suck at long term relationships and love getting new notches..something about the conquest of it all. But sometimes I really want a son. If I had a kid I would go the surrogate route like Cristiano Ronaldo

But part of me also loves being a bachelor with zero responsibilities for others and living my life to the fullest on my own terms. Spending all my extra cash on gear and growth, clubbing, vacationing, titty bars etc..

I think the ‘what if’ factor just scares me the most. Like never getting to watch a little me play sports or never seeing my potential offspring hit life milestones

So are there any dudes on here who have chosen to be eternal bachelors? And do you have any regrets?
 

Dial_tone

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Aug 1, 2003
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I didn't marry until 51 and I wrote off kids about 15 years prior. I hope my sperm count is zero.
 

musclemoose

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Jan 23, 2017
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714
I'm 37 and dont have kids nor do i want them. i dont want them cause i dont just want kids. I dont want them because of the way this world is turning out. Picture what you're kids will be doing in 10-20 years. Makes me sick to think of it. This world is turning to shit. Technology in my opinion is not making the world better off socially. And medically even if there is magic pill to save you it costs $50,000 to take it. Our country is 20 trillion in debt. Families are fully leveraged because of the cost of healthcare, rent/mortgage, daycare, etc... And costs will not go down from here. So when i think of having kids i think of what future could i possibly give them that is better than mine. And i just dont see it for them.
 

tripleOT

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Slice man in 3...2...1....
 

Girth

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I already have them, but I'll flat out say it was because I had them at an age and with a frame of mind that was still socially "normal". That was my fault but you deal with the consequences of your choices.

It's a mindset that the normal person has. While I too agree with what was said above about technology and what not. The people who are GOOD parents are those who've essentially given up on achievement and improvement of themselves or their endeavors and have decided to focus their energy and time into making someone else their best. Akin to an athlete becoming a coach after their career is over and they know that their time spent on what they deem as "achievement", would now be a waste.

I'm not bashing those who take that approach to life, it's just not for EVERYONE. If you really take a hard look at those who succeed in whatever area of life it is, should there be kids, there is a nanny or a full time mom/dad who does EVERYTHING for those kids.

It's about doing what makes YOU happy and how you want to define your legacy.
 

romo

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Nov 26, 2007
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Im 52 now,never married and never had kids,did not really plan it this way,just the way it worked out. I do have a serious girlfriend right now and she is talking marriage. :eek:
 

rookx750

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Oct 28, 2011
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Medically can’t at the ag3 of 20,so don’t take it for granted if you can be a great parent. There is a lot of shitty people out in this world and most shouldn’t have them so maybe one day I will take one.....or two from them.
 

maldorf

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Marriage is def not for me, I suck at long term relationships and love getting new notches..something about the conquest of it all. But sometimes I really want a son. If I had a kid I would go the surrogate route like Cristiano Ronaldo

But part of me also loves being a bachelor with zero responsibilities for others and living my life to the fullest on my own terms. Spending all my extra cash on gear and growth, clubbing, vacationing, titty bars etc..

I think the ‘what if’ factor just scares me the most. Like never getting to watch a little me play sports or never seeing my potential offspring hit life milestones

So are there any dudes on here who have chosen to be eternal bachelors? And do you have any regrets?

Sounds like you are nowhere near ready to have kids. I recommend you wait until your feelings change and you are ready for the serious responsibility of having children. It is a full time job in itself and not easy to do. The last thing you want to do is bring a baby into the world and raise them ill prepared for life.


How old are you now? Men can father kids way into old age. In your 40s it would still be rather easy to have kids if your wife is about 10 years younger. Even women can have kids well into their 40s and early 50s. Don't rush it. When you are ready you will know it. It is like getting married but even more serious. The level of commitment is the highest a human being can ever experience.
 

BOWTECH

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I personally can’t stand kids. Had a vasectomy in my early 20’s and it was the smartest thing I have ever done. I have a niece that just got married and I only saw her maybe 3 times in my life and they lived close. I just have zero tolerance for children. I’m getting close to 50 now and I don’t regret it one bit. It’s allowed me to do a lot of great things in life that I wouldn’t have done if I would have had children. But hey everyone is different.
 

Crom

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I turned 50 this year and don't have kids and never wanted them. I just have no interest at all and think it's irresponsible to put kids into a world if you are not 100% into them. As mentioned above our society has many aspects I seriously have a problem with and humans are overpopulating our beautiful planet as is so I am not contributing to that.

Also, if I got a kid and the relationship with the mother went to hell there is no way I could accept another man taking care of my kid(s) when she finds a new man.

Of course, not wanting kids is seriously going to limit the amount of women that are interested in a serious relationship since most women want kids. You will have to find someone who already has kids and is done having more or find one that actually doesn't want kids.
 

SoFocused

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Messages
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Sounds like you are nowhere near ready to have kids. I recommend you wait until your feelings change and you are ready for the serious responsibility of having children. It is a full time job in itself and not easy to do. The last thing you want to do is bring a baby into the world and raise them ill prepared for life.


How old are you now? Men can father kids way into old age. In your 40s it would still be rather easy to have kids if your wife is about 10 years younger. Even women can have kids well into their 40s and early 50s. Don't rush it. When you are ready you will know it. It is like getting married but even more serious. The level of commitment is the highest a human being can ever experience.

Im 28. I know I could have a kid later in my 40s but I also don’t want to feel too old when they’re entering upper school. 35 would be the cut off for me personally. If I were a parent I’d be 100% committed and financially stable. Not something I’d ever take lightly at all, I’d want my child to be the greatest. I would just want some balance and not to lose myself and my hobbies in the process . I believe money plays a big factor in this
 

G.I.Bro

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Jun 24, 2012
Messages
4,136
I have a 2.5 year old boy. It's pretty cool. It's hard at times but amazing at others. I was never a huge proponent of kids. I did it because my wife wanted to have a family and it felt like the natural progression.

Would it be more fun to have no kids at 35, yes. But life would seem kind of empty and dull at 50 with no kids or family. You guys don't want to admit it, but as we age everything gets less fun and less exciting and you start enjoying living vicariously through your kids and derive enjoyment from seeing them enjoy all those things that lost luster as you aged. Their joy becomes your joy. Watching my kid get excited about a pool raft brings me simple joy that money, vanity, prestige and women won't when you're older.
 
Last edited:

SoFocused

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Oct 16, 2011
Messages
194
I personally can’t stand kids. Had a vasectomy in my early 20’s and it was the smartest thing I have ever done. I have a niece that just got married and I only saw her maybe 3 times in my life and they lived close. I just have zero tolerance for children. I’m getting close to 50 now and I don’t regret it one bit. It’s allowed me to do a lot of great things in life that I wouldn’t have done if I would have had children. But hey everyone is different.

fuck

Appreciate the honesy though brother
 

SoFocused

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Registered
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Oct 16, 2011
Messages
194
I have a 2.5 year old boy. It's pretty cool. It's hard at times but amazing at others. I was never a huge proponent of kids. I did it because my wife wanted to have a family and it felt like the natural progression.

Would it be more fun to have no kids at 35, yes. But life would seem kind of empty and dull at 50 with no kids or family. You guys don't want to admit it, but as we age everything gets less fun and less exciting and you start enjoying living vicariously through your kids and derive enjoyment from seeing them enjoy all those things that lost luster as you aged. Their joy becomes your joy. Watching my kid get excited about a pool raft brings me simple joy that money, vanity, prestige and women won't when you're older.

Yes living vicariously through a kid when I’m 50 is seriously one thing I feel like like I’d be missing out on. Like in my 30s and early 40s it’d prob still be fun to have none. But at 50+ I’m afraid of feeling like I’m just going to have a bunch of material things and no sense of real joy

Thank all you fellas for the thoughtful posts keep them coming
 

SoFocused

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Oct 16, 2011
Messages
194
I already have them, but I'll flat out say it was because I had them at an age and with a frame of mind that was still socially "normal". That was my fault but you deal with the consequences of your choices.

It's a mindset that the normal person has. While I too agree with what was said above about technology and what not. The people who are GOOD parents are those who've essentially given up on achievement and improvement of themselves or their endeavors and have decided to focus their energy and time into making someone else their best. Akin to an athlete becoming a coach after their career is over and they know that their time spent on what they deem as "achievement", would now be a waste.

I'm not bashing those who take that approach to life, it's just not for EVERYONE. If you really take a hard look at those who succeed in whatever area of life it is, should there be kids, there is a nanny or a full time mom/dad who does EVERYTHING for those kids.

It's about doing what makes YOU happy and how you want to define your legacy.

Very good point

There’s also something inside me that wants to give another life opportunities I never had and to see what potential they could have with the right guidance
 

Beti ona

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Aug 12, 2017
Messages
1,463
I'm 37 and dont have kids nor do i want them. i dont want them cause i dont just want kids. I dont want them because of the way this world is turning out. Picture what you're kids will be doing in 10-20 years. Makes me sick to think of it. This world is turning to shit. Technology in my opinion is not making the world better off socially. And medically even if there is magic pill to save you it costs $50,000 to take it. Our country is 20 trillion in debt. Families are fully leveraged because of the cost of healthcare, rent/mortgage, daycare, etc... And costs will not go down from here. So when i think of having kids i think of what future could i possibly give them that is better than mine. And i just dont see it for them.

Technology and science are never a problem, it is the culture that does not know how to make the most of it because everyone is discussing stupidities and looking for lucrative profits, taking advantage of widespread ignorance among the population.

But your vision is excellent, a rational egoist would never have a child in this world on the way to disaster. The altruists would adopt children without parents.

The irrational selfish are those who decide to have children despite all these problems, because they follow the shit tradition, or because they are afraid of loneliness, or because they get bored and need fun and give meaning to their lives.
 

Beti ona

Banned
Joined
Aug 12, 2017
Messages
1,463
I have a 2.5 year old boy. It's pretty cool. It's hard at times but amazing at others. I was never a huge proponent of kids. I did it because my wife wanted to have a family and it felt like the natural progression.

Would it be more fun to have no kids at 35, yes. But life would seem kind of empty and dull at 50 with no kids or family. You guys don't want to admit it, but as we age everything gets less fun and less exciting and you start enjoying living vicariously through your kids and derive enjoyment from seeing them enjoy all those things that lost luster as you aged. Their joy becomes your joy. Watching my kid get excited about a pool raft brings me simple joy that money, vanity, prestige and women won't when you're older.

Many people get pets, believe me, you can love them as much as your own children. In fact, many people love animals more than people.

Pets give you all the good things about children without the negative parts (social problems, drugs, school abuse, disinterest in studying...).
 

buck

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Apr 27, 2006
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I am 58 and do not have any kids and never had a burning desire to(neither did my X wife) so I figured it was best to not have one on purpose or by accident. And had the issue taken care of many years ago. If you like to party then kids would probably not be the best way to go. As training them that that is how they should be might not be the best way to go. I choose adventures,home stocks and bonds as how to spend my money and do not regret my choice.
 

SoFocused

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Registered
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Oct 16, 2011
Messages
194
Many people get pets, believe me, you can love them as much as your own children. In fact, many people love animals more than people.

Pets give you all the good things about children without the negative parts (social problems, drugs, school abuse, disinterest in studying...).

I just adopted a nice dog some months ago and she’s fun at times but can’t even talk. I could think of a million good things a child that grows into an adult could give me that she can’t
 

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