Anyone's wife get in shape after getting WAY out of shape?

[lynx]

lol....i honestly never looked for or wanted anyone with MY fitness level.

i consider this MY thing....MY time....she can have HER thing.....and HER time.

but, being fitness orientated and wanting to "look half way decent" are 2
different things.....

most of the time.....you figure this out too late....and are already in for the
long haul.....

the thing that bothers me is.....when the other person ACTS like they are
into the same things as you....basically FAKING IT....to NAB YOU....lol
then once they do....your like wtf happen..????

Your post reminded me of this picture, lol!

And I get what you're saying about them being two different things but based off the responses in this thread what are the chances that a woman is going to look good without some form of fitness, whether it be just going for walks, swimming, lifting, etc? Albeit it can happen if she keeps a handle on her eating, however, I would want someone who is somewhat active as it's a big part of my life. I guess I see being fitness orientated as a small course in discipline and I think I couldn't respect someone who didn't do SOMETHING. That's not a way I want to live. I will say that most people dating are just seeing if there is any chemistry at all before thinking down the road, long term.

 

[Big A]

A woman marries a man thinking she can change him, and he doesn't change.

A man marries a woman hoping she doesn't change, and she does.

I have always been of the belief that no truer words have been spoken. That's why I wish I was gay

 

[Notch]

Got mine on 2ius everyday plus her zumba workouts ...lol

 

[11sh11]

In the 1st pic I was 185, 38% bf... fat! 2nd pic is 160, 7%bf.
Yes, it's possible to get out of shape and get back into shape. I've had 3 kids, was a single parent, and very unhappy when I was at my heaviest.

Your wife is already aware of her shape, and is unhappy about it. Most women swallow their issues, literally and figuratively. Check her hormones, blood work, and lifes circumstances. Seriously. If a woman isn't happy, fulfilled, and feeling loved on the inside, no medical intervention will help her change her physique. Get her excited about something in life... a new project, learning something new, some home redecorating. Seriously, again. Enthusiasm and outside interests and challenges will be the catalyst to get physically fired up.

 

[tenny]

In the 1st pic I was 185, 38% bf... fat! 2nd pic is 160, 7%bf.
Yes, it's possible to get out of shape and get back into shape. I've had 3 kids, was a single parent, and very unhappy when I was at my heaviest.

Your wife is already aware of her shape, and is unhappy about it. Most women swallow their issues, literally and figuratively. Check her hormones, blood work, and lifes circumstances. Seriously. If a woman isn't happy, fulfilled, and feeling loved on the inside, no medical intervention will help her change her physique. Get her excited about something in life... a new project, learning something new, some home redecorating. Seriously, again. Enthusiasm and outside interests and challenges will be the catalyst to get physically fired up.

well......they must love themselves first....and WANT to change...and WANT
to be excited about something....you can only lead the horse to water (or
in this case the cow)....

without that....its useless.

 

[Notch]

In the 1st pic I was 185, 38% bf... fat! 2nd pic is 160, 7%bf.
Yes, it's possible to get out of shape and get back into shape. I've had 3 kids, was a single parent, and very unhappy when I was at my heaviest.

Your wife is already aware of her shape, and is unhappy about it. Most women swallow their issues, literally and figuratively. Check her hormones, blood work, and lifes circumstances. Seriously. If a woman isn't happy, fulfilled, and feeling loved on the inside, no medical intervention will help her change her physique. Get her excited about something in life... a new project, learning something new, some home redecorating. Seriously, again. Enthusiasm and outside interests and challenges will be the catalyst to get physically fired up.

Wow great job...

 

[little slice]

Seriously, again. Enthusiasm and outside interests and challenges will be the catalyst to get physically fired up.

ehh...


some people rise up in the face of adversity, and conquer


others crumble, and become fatter



you are clearly the former (amazing work btw)... I feel that most women (and far too many men) are the latter.


when a woman has no incentive to work hard (I.E. her man can't leave her without financial apocalypse), I think it's safe to say, based on the small sample we have in this thread, that most women will take the easy, tasty and calorie-dense route.

because "why not? lmao"

 

[little slice]

This is untrue and comical. Maybe if your some avwrage guy and draw this contract up yourself. Any good lawyer would have clauses built into the contract "your agreeing on your own free will" "not under the influence of meds/drugs/alchoal that would impair your judgement at time of signing"

perhaps.. but how do you think those clauses came about? I would reckon it was out of necessity.

This is 2016, men dont always get the short end of the stick when it comes to divorce/custody.

three words:


Tender years doctrine

 

[11sh11]

Tenny: true, I'm highly motivated, many aren't. Men and women. Was thinking too, if this were his wife's exercise habits when he met her, and when he married her, did he expect different? Did he expect her not to gain weight with those habits? Know yourself better, know what you want your future to look like, and choose someone who shares your priorities, goals, and passions.

Notch: Thanks! I was highly motivated, and never want to go back to feeling/looking that way

Little Slice: thanks... I've never been "average", no desire to start now. But there's a reason women usually decline and get complacent. Most women are driven from the heart. Even the fat, lazy ones. Something is off emotionally in that relationship. Probably not the right one... 7 years, critical turning point.

 

[Pekkerwood]

I have always been of the belief that no truer words have been spoken. That's why I wish I was gay

I lived it. Not the gay part, though that may have been more desirable than what I went through! I used to blame her. Then I Zenned out and blamed no one, now I for sure, blame me.

I had a guy I looked up to as a young adult in my mid twenties who had it going on. Stunning ladies buying him clothes, cars, even though he made good money and owned a nice house, etc. This one lady he was with who bought him a Jag (I know now that back in that time it may not have been doing anyone a favor!) was a beauty winner in my State and seemed terrific.

I asked him, "Joe, why are you not getting married?" He looked at me just cool as hell, and said, "Pekkerwood, until I can answer the question, "How would my life be better married?", I am not doing it."

That stuck with me a long time.

PWood

 

[MightyJohn]

Have a friend who's a national level bodybuilder, after a few kids his wife was out of shape...2-3yrs ago they did a local show together she did figure or bikini, an AMAZING transformation for her...fast forward a few years, she's now qualified for nationals...they are a jaw dropping couple

 

[doug1]

My only issue with a hardcore gym rat girl, is that I like to live life a little. I like to eat stuff that is "bad for you", last thing I want, is while I'm downing a burger is look over at a woman eating a protein bar or shake, that just wouldn't work for me. Besides, I like some softness.

 

[Thor]

Well...

one things for sure ,after reading most of these I will NEVER get married again. I was once and she was cool and fine at first, but didnt tell me she had a drinking problem, once i found out it wasnt even the weight gain as much as it was her being a lush and irresponsible, something i just cant stand. But i did get a beautiful and smart and responsible daughter out of it, although the cost was very high, not only financially but stress was off the charts, i had to go to court and fight for custody and go thru so much ! i didnt know if i would make it thru, but i did and finally was awarded sole custody !..(We got divorced) Now i am older and wiser, I agree with Linx in that I will only be with someone now who understands the lifestyle and lives it with me, i had a buddy of mine show me a pic of a hottie and ask me if i wanted to date her and i said, " I'd love to but only if she lifts and eats healthy and doesnt drink ! ".. Unfortunately too many people are content with being " average Joes"..really narrows it down

 

[jayl19]

My only issue with a hardcore gym rat girl, is that I like to live life a little. I like to eat stuff that is "bad for you", last thing I want, is while I'm downing a burger is look over at a woman eating a protein bar or shake, that just wouldn't work for me. Besides, I like some softness.

Hahahaha so true

Lad I know lifts, but isn't too serious about it, his new girl weighs everything and follows a diet perfectly year round, he can't eat junk as SHE body/food shames HIM HAHA

 

[little slice]

would you guys rather have a crazy disciplined girl?




or a typical butterball?



if you had to choose between the two.

 

[johnjuanb1]

would you guys rather have a crazy disciplined girl?




or a typical butterball?



if you had to choose between the two.

A crazy disciplined girl. I can relate to that. Hahaha

 

[big_rich]

My wife started out really thin which I liked after each kid she retained some fat and after our 2 kids she maintained a weight about 25 pounds over her original weight. I finally talked her into going with me to the gym now she's hooked she just finish running fw501516 with great results she is 10 pounds away from her original weight. I have her counting macros and she is progressing nicely. She won't let me post pics or I Would. I really admire hard work and dedication that she is putting in

 

[Bio-hazard]

I have always been of the belief that no truer words have been spoken. That's why I wish I was gay

When Big A speaks... dammit son, shit resonates lol

 

[Bio-hazard]

I lived it. Not the gay part, though that may have been more desirable than what I went through! I used to blame her. Then I Zenned out and blamed no one, now I for sure, blame me.

I had a guy I looked up to as a young adult in my mid twenties who had it going on. Stunning ladies buying him clothes, cars, even though he made good money and owned a nice house, etc. This one lady he was with who bought him a Jag (I know now that back in that time it may not have been doing anyone a favor!) was a beauty winner in my State and seemed terrific.

I asked him, "Joe, why are you not getting married?" He looked at me just cool as hell, and said, "Pekkerwood, until I can answer the question, "How would my life be better married?", I am not doing it."

That stuck with me a long time.

PWood

Can I just find a girl who buys me a car/civic? Lol

Been there. Had a lady who wanted to be my suga-mamma.. had millions. She was 15 years older... not bad and was attractive with HUGE tits but I couldn't do it. Not forever at least. Ugh.... 10 years later, id go back and wifey her lol fml

 

[landmarkchem.linda]

My wife and I met in high school were now in our early 40s . Over the years and three kids later , busy with life we both ended up getting out of shape. I was first to realize it and wasn't having any part of it so I hit it hard and havnt stopped and I'm getting close to my goals. At first it was just me , and then the kids wanted on board and then with my results the wife came on board. I never pushed it on her but always made it very known to her I'd help anyway she needed. First everyone got on board with the gym because they seen how much I enjoyed it then they wanted the diet. My wife still has a bit to go to be back to her high school weight but she's getting there faster all the time and is doing it in a manner that her body is adjusting as well no skin sagging or anything even close. I think she only got up to maybe 180 but carried decent.

Here's my advise after being together twenty some years I approached it as her friend not her husband, I made sure she new I hoped she bettered herself and would do everything in my power to help that happen but it was up to her. I made it a family activity,stuff is always more appealing as a family effort.I also made sure she new that I would love her if she bettered her self or not but at some point it may take a lot of Viagra and a blindfold lol... I never pushed on her in any way but I think to some degree everyone wants to better then self it just a matter of being in the right environment for it to happen.


Don't know if that helps but that's how my family turned around.My wife and kids will bitch now if they don't get to hit the gym, so if you stay after it suttley but steadily it can be done.

I like your story and very touched by the love between you and your wife.

Some marriage wisdom also learned from you, approach your wife/husband as friend, and never push but guide.