Another BALDNAZI case...here's my story

[HELLA SWOLE]

I do not know if many of you remember, but about 4 weeks ago I posted a thread about how I went into the doc with severe lower right quadrant abdominal pains with suspicion of having appendicitis. The doctor sent me to get a cat scan done that same Friday afternoon. A few hours later, the doc called with the results and it turned out that my appendix was in fact inflamed showing signs of acute appendicitis and that I would need to be admitted to the hospital that evening for an appendectomy. The doctor then told me that the radiologist noticed a “fullness” in my liver which was hinting at me possibly having something called a “hepatic adenoma”…same thing Bladnazi had. She said this was a benign growth in the liver that usually only occurs in women who take the pill and men who take steroids. This hit me like a ton of bricks and all I could think about was bladnazis horrific experience that we all are aware of which happened a few months ago. She told me this was not an immediate problem, but was one that would definitely need to be looked further into after my surgery, but that getting my appendix taken out ASAP was what needed to be done first. So, the Monday following my surgery I called the doc and asked her what we were going to and she said I would have to come into the office after two weeks toget an ultra sound done on my liver. I obviously was getting anxious and my mind was getting the best of me so I wanted to go in right then, but I had to wait two weeks for the swelling in my abdomen to go down from the surgery in order to perform the ultrasound. I was repeatedly going over my situation in my head and it just didn’t add up, I did not abuse gear, my bloodwork was fine and I did everything by the book, there was no way this was happening to me. Finally I go to the doc and sure enough they find a 6.4 cm mass in my liver. The doc sends me to get an MRI the following day to get a clearer picture to bring to a specialist that she referred me to.

I go to the specialist and he basically confirms what I already knew, that I had a hepatic adenoma and he then asked me if I was using steroids. I told him I had used them in the past but not recently (not 100% true) and I told them I did not use high doses and I tried to stay away from orals (that is 100% true). He then raised his eyebrow and told me he STROGNLY suggested against steroid use because what I have going on is in direct correlation with steroid usage and actually happens a lot more often than people think. Hell, if it hadn’t had been for my appendicitis, I would be walking around right now with a large tumor inside my liver and have NO IDEA. And then have the same fait of having it explode like baldnazi did… He told me he thought I would be okay because I am young (22) and healthy, but that he would be bringing me in for periodic blood work and to measure the tumor to make sure it is not growing. He said if it grows at all, that it could indicate that it is being aggravated still or that it could be cancerous (which he is confident that it is malignant…THANK GOD!) He said if it did grow though that it would have to be removed via a VERY serious surgery like the one baldnazi had, which I DO NOT want to happen. He said he will be watching it over time and will decide then if a biopsy needs to be done of the liver. For those of you who don’t know, I biopsy is when they bring you into the O.R. and use a local anesthesia and stick a LONG ASS needle into your CHEST!! (right under yoru sternum) to get a sample of the tumor inorder for them to observe it more closely.

I go back to see the doc in three weeks and I believe I will know more at
that time. I think he will determine whether or not a biopsy will be necessary based on my blood work...which I am expecting to still be normal...I hope.


Continued....

 

[HELLA SWOLE]

As far as my past usage (because I know many will ask), I have been using for about 3 years. The first two years, I cycled on and off, like any other person and then I competed this past July and I decided after that to stay on in between cycles and just cruise with 100-200mg of test per week. I would do this "cruising" for about 12-16 weeks and then ramp up on 600mg of test and 400mg EQ...nothing more. Actually, I was on 150mg of test per week from July until November of ‘06 and then ramped my doses back up, so I had only been on for 8 wks when this went down. I know some of you may be in disagreement with that, but it was a choice I made, and its done, so please don't lecture. My decision wasn't made until after researching A TON on my own and going back and forth with it in my head ahead of time weighing the benefits/consequences. The first two years that I used gear, I had done probably 6 cycles and each one of them was jump started with NO MORE than 40mg of Dbol for 3-4 weeks MAX with the same injectables I listed above at the same doses. SO as you can see, I really don't/didn't consider myself to be "abusing" at least from a bodybuilding standpoint. I thought I was playing it safer than most. I always ate clean, watched my body fat, did some cardio, took low doses, didn't drink except 1-2 times per month (if that) and didn;t use much orals (milk thistle was used year around as well), and had blood work done every other month, had an extensive vitamin/mineral profile etc. BY the way, my blood work was always fine, maybe one thing would be off by a point or two sometimes, but nothing that raised an eyebrow.

Oh yea, for my show, I dietied for 16 wks and I used Test prop at 500mg/wk, and EQ at 400mg/wk, I then threw in tren at 75-100mg EOD for the last 8 wks, and dropped the EQ, then at 6 wks out I used 50mg winny, and the final TWO weeks, I threw in 20mg of halo ED. I am sure this is the time period when most of the stress was put on my liver. Even then, my blood work was fine, but my cholesterol was shitty (from the winny) and it returend to normal after teh show. Had anythign been out of whack, I would have topped the orals.

Ya know guys, I have been seeing a lot of threads lately about liver issues and I have even seen guys say that liver toxicity is overrated with gear. I look at these posts and just shake my head. I am only 22 years old, which is obviously young in this game, but I feel like I have learned wayy more than I should have at this age and I felt like I was wise beyond my years even before this. I see some of the cycles posted on here and I am in amazement. I was one of the few younger guys who listened to the older guys. I worked with SKIP for my show and still am for offseason nutrition and he also helped guide me the right way, but i have to say, i had it all down for the most part on my own.

Baldnazi said a while back that you would start seeing a lot more things popping up in the future, and I believed him then when he said it (before this happened to me) and I believe him even more now. The stuff is so readily available and there are too many dickheads on the boards that don't know their foot from their ass who are giving terrible info and advice like it is medically proven or some shit. Guys are also getting wayyy too cavalier on their own usage even while they know better. All I can say is to be careful (how cliche' is that?) and try to take a step back and think about your situation rationally from an outside point of view before making your decisions. THINK ABOUT YOUR FUTURE. It is the nature of the beast to live in the "now" We have all been guilty of it, guys just think about getting huge and get so tunnel visioned in the process that they end up with all kinds of problems down the road whether it be health or relationship issues.


This was a little bit hard for me to write, because I am not one who likes to publicize my personal issues or my gear use on the boards. I am a little ashamed, a little bit embarrassed, and A LOT depressed about this whole situation, but I feel obligated to tell it how it is anyways. I was hesitant to post this at first, but if I could even save one person directly or indirectly, it will all be wayy more than worth it. Some of you probably read this thinking to themselves this is just some young guy who doesn't know shit, and that is fine, but I am not able to single handedly save everyone on this board either. I gotta tell you though, hindsight is 20/20 and once some shit like this happens to you, it becomes VERY REAL and your WHOLE perspective changes. Things become a lot more clear.

This post probably seems like I am doing very well considering the situation, which I may be, but inside I am a wreck. I can't stop thinking about this fucking thing in my chest and even worrying about it even having the potential to "pop" like Baldnazi's, or maybe possibly having to have VERY SERIOUS surgery further down the road. I know it is better to focus on the positive, which I am trying to do, I am thankful it is not worse, but at the same time, its very hard not to dwell on this issue when it is so drastic. I really have no one to talk about this because hardly anyone knew I was on gear and even though I am close with my family, I am hesitant to tell them because they are VERY against the whole issue of AAS and wouldn't understand. And I almost feel like it would be kind of selfish to have them worrying about this issue with me when it was really brought on by myself.
Baldnazi had the courteousy (sp) to call me last night and talking to him really helped me out a ton. He may seem like just some big crazy controversial dude on the boards (lol), but let me tell you, he is a really good guy. I only talked to him for 30-45 minutes, but that was enough to tell me he was a real kinda guy and had a great heart. The words he lent to me and just being able to talk to someone who has been through it (albeit a lot worse) really was invaluable to me. I will be forever thankful and respectful to him for that.

 

[stanio115]

And you've never had any abnormalities showed on the blood tests?

 

[HELLA SWOLE]

And you've never had any abnormalities showed on the blood tests?

Nope...my alkaline phosphatase was a couple points elevated one time and another time I think my ALT or AST (I can't remember which) level was SLIGHTLY elevated, but I took the necessary precautions and came back for more bloodwork and it would be normal....even right now...my blood work is PERFECT...EVERYTHING.

I am guessing some people may just be more prone to certain problems than others. But still....you just never know.

 

[marbalizer99]

Good post HS. People need to read this kind of stuff.

Also, what is the point of orals, such as Dbol? I don't know much about them but I always thought they were for quick gains. If I am infact right about that, why are people in such a hurry to make gains on a cycle, your already going to be making quicker gains than usual. If your on a "safe" cycle why jeopardize that with orals (even at low doses). Making gains slowly while on seems like the safest way to do it anyway.

Good luck. BN seems like a good guy, having someone thats been through this before and is willing to talk to you about the problem shows the kind of people that are on this board and why this is the only BB board I visit.

 

[BALDNAZI]

Bloodwork

First of all,Hella Swole is only 22 years old,so some of you are saying "young and dumb,fucked himself up" Not the case.I spoke to him last night and let me tell you he is very bright and a gentleman,real good people.

I have stressed the importance of bloodwork but as Hella Swole found out,it will not tell you about an adenoma.My doctor said the same thing.MRIs and Cat scans are the only way to know for sure.I would bet that quite a few on this board have something wrong with their liver and do not even know it.Get yourselves checked.

My case was at the extreme end of the scale,a fully ruptured adenoma.Thats as bad as it gets,they had to remove the entire right lobe of my liver for Christ's sake.The scar on my abdomen is sick,I went through pure hell,that to this day I think back and cannot believe it really happened.

As I always said,I will not preach against steroids,they serve a purpose,but to take them recklessly just to be big and bad?Thats a lost cause.If I have to go on HRT I will have to be monitored religiously to make sure I never get another adenoma.That,along with not being able to have kids,is the main reason Im reluctant to go on HRT.

HellaSwole,my brother,keep your head up and be thankful you caught it in time.You should be fine,just don't be stupid and do something that your head is telling you not to.You know the answers already,its up to you to follow through....

 

[oldfella]

Hella, You have done the right thing to come out and tell it like it is bro. I'm sorry to hear of your bad news, but it isn't all doom and gloom. You had it detected early and now the doc will monitor things. At least you know, unlike BN, who was caught unaware. This is one of the many bad sides to our culture. You are quite right in saying that there are dickheads out there giving people dangerous advice with regard to use/abuse. I cringe every time I read posts here about how much they are using, almost as though they are bragging. It's wrong. I feel for you bro, It may seem like the future is uncertain, but it isn't. You are young and fortunately you will recover. You now know exactly what you must do! Also you can now educate people which is a good thing. This is a must read for anyone/everyone that is/was/or is thinking about aas use. Hella it takes courage to face the music, there is no shame or embarassment in what you have done. You made a choice and it sounds like you went about things responsibly, it has not worked in your favor. Please keep this thread going for everyone's sake. It may just make the difference. Keep us posted, and above all keep your chin up. Stay strong BRO.

 

[pimpman]

wow sorry to hear this happend to you bro.hope everything turns out good for you.one thing to remember though some people body or organse i should say dont handle thing given to it.like lets say one dude could be on gear for 10 years and they die of old age and another one can do 1 cycle and mess something up in their body.reason why i tell you this is because dont be so hard on your self.dont go spending your days blaming yourself for this.yea most likely the use of gear was the cause of it but whats done is done and cant turn time back.i know you are worried fuck very worried but if you stress over it its worse for the body nerv system.keep your hopes high you will survive this one.if you dont beleive me go into a quit room and ask GOD he will answer you.

 

[Tyrone]

Thanks for posting so well HS...I pray everything goes OK for you in what ever is determined...Respect to you and Baldnazi...

 

[stanio115]

I don't think that there is a single BBer who ever does those MRIs or CAT scans.

 

[Enanthanator]

Thank God you caught it in time and my prayers are with you bro...With all those things you have said, bloodwork, low doses, vitamins, etc...it doesnt seem like you did anything irresponsible. I do appreciate you sharing your story and I do wish you the best.

 

[littlemack]

Very sorry to hear this man. I know U got a little pissed at me in that other thread, but your a class act all the way and I know what its like to be faced with scary shit like this. I don't know much about these tumors, but will read up more and learn. Is this something that a trained physician can feel by palpating the liver? My Dad's a retired physician, and told me when he was working the ER he often didn't have time to go order and X-Ray or anything and could always "feel" a swollen appendix. Today things are a little different, and I don't know if physicians are still this skilled. I'm wondering if you have or had pain to the touch in this area. I think I remember having my doc recently sort of push her fingers under my ribcage in the liver area and ask if I had pain there. Did the same thing with my appendix and did the same sort of thing with my thyroid.
Definitely an eye opening post.
I hope all the best for you man and remember...Health Comes First.

p.s.Also how is your spleen? Was it affected as well?

 

[HELLA SWOLE]

Marbalizer- you are right...there is nothign you can achieve with orals, that you can't without them. THey are pointless added stress to the system and are not worth it IMO. I know a lot of guys feel like they need them to compete, but even then, if you are lean enough to begin with, you don't need any orals to "harden" you up. Like I said, hindsite is 20/20. I am sure orals were the main factor, but then again, you never know the toll injectables could be taking as well. Especially tren...keep an eye out on that one.

BN is right, I would be willing to bet there are at least a few guys on the boards who are walking around with the same shit and have no idea. That is the scary thing...its like a time bomb ticking just waiting to go off. A lot of people are probably pretty reluctant to post their health problems out in the open, you never know who it si happening to. Please guys, get FULL check ups. Shit, if you have to, lie to the doc that you are having chest pains and they will probably do a CT of your abdomen paid for by your insurance.

Oldfella- thanks for the kind words, and its good to see people like you on the boards with their heads on straight, its wayy too easy to get too caught up in this game.

Pimpman-thanks for the encouragement bro, it is greatly appreciated. I know I will be fine in the long run (I hope at least), but things just seem glum at the moment. Things aren't good for me, but I think they will get better. This situation will help me focus on the more important things now that I sometimes tended to neglect such as God, family, and other relationships (friends) Like I said, I have a whole new perspective. I believe God works in mysterious way and there is a reason for every action he takes in your life. I have many beliefs for him having me go through what I am going through now, but they are personal and I will keep them to myself. It is kinda nice to have some idea of what direction God wants to take you though....it really helps and gives me courage. I will say though...I am not looking forward to my HPTA recovery after not having a break for 15 months. It will be a long hard road I am sure, but I am young, and my nutrition/training is tight, so we'll see.

Tyrone-Thanks for the prayers brother. I just hope this hits home to some people or at least helps people make better decisions.

 

[HELLA SWOLE]

Stanio- you are right, but it seems like this should be a necessary caution from here on out now doesn't it?

Enanthator-Thanks for your posts these nice posts really make me feel better, even though you may not think so. You are right, I did everything "right". The only thing I keep harping on is the fact that I drank every now and then (sue me, i'm in college) and that I may have overdone the orals for my show. But then again, I didn't go any higher with my orals than any other competitor who's cycles I have seen posted on here for a show, usually much less even. It jsut goes to show you that it really depends on the person. You jsut never know. I am not trying to scare people, but I am trying to "open their eyes"


Littlemack- I was not mad at you bro, you letting you knwo myfeelings. You are a great guy. Your character shines through in your posts and it amazes me how you keep such an upbeat tone to ALL of your posts everyday, I admire that enthusiasm. You know, just from us exchanging posts back and forth in the past that I got respect for you bro.

I have been reading, reading, reading ever since I foudn this out. No often times, the physician can not feel it because it is usually WITHIN the liver. My normal measures a completely normal size (I believe the MRI said 15cm) so you can not feel it, just by prodding around. As far as pain, you know, I never had it before, but over these past 1-2 days I have noticed it. If I push up under my sternum I can definitely feel it. Or if I breath in REALLY deep or exhale COMPLETELY and then bring my shoulders forward and kind of concave my chest inwards, I can feel the pressure/slight pain in my chest, that is the scariest part. Up until now though, I never felt one thing at all. Thanks for the kind words though littlemack.

Very sorry to hear this man. I know U got a little pissed at me in that other thread, but your a class act all the way and I know what its like to be faced with scary shit like this. I don't know much about these tumors, but will read up more and learn. Is this something that a trained physician can feel by palpating the liver? My Dad's a retired physician, and told me when he was working the ER he often didn't have time to go order and X-Ray or anything and could always "feel" a swollen appendix. Today things are a little different, and I don't know if physicians are still this skilled. I'm wondering if you have or had pain to the touch in this area. I think I remember having my doc recently sort of push her fingers under my ribcage in the liver area and ask if I had pain there. Did the same thing with my appendix and did the same sort of thing with my thyroid.
Definitely an eye opening post.
I hope all the best for you man and remember...Health Comes First.

 

[dragonfire101]

Alot of adenoma's appear to be presenting in past or current AAS users. As some may know I have been recently diagnosed with a Pituitary Adenoma and would have never known without an MRI. AAS does affect the Pituitary significantly.

 

[littlemack]

Thanks man. I was a complete ass in that previous thread anyway. lol.
So what do the docs think? Is this something that you will have to live with for the rest of your life or will it decrease in size over time? This is a really rare thing here in the states, but I found an article that looked pretty good that you guys might want to read. I think some patients complain of pain and some don't like you've said. Was the doc worrie about this benign tumor turning malignant at some point?

**broken link removed**

 

[HELLA SWOLE]

Alot of adenoma's appear to be presenting in past or current AAS users. As some may know I have been recently diagnosed with a Pituitary Adenoma and would have never known without an MRI. AAS does affect the Pituitary significantly.

I did not know that bro. I am very sorry to hear that. SO when were you diagnosed and what is the plan of action? Just to come clean and forget about gear and see if it improves? or what?

 

[pimpman]

Marbalizer- you are right...there is nothign you can achieve with orals, that you can't without them. THey are pointless added stress to the system and are not worth it IMO. I know a lot of guys feel like they need them to compete, but even then, if you are lean enough to begin with, you don't need any orals to "harden" you up. Like I said, hindsite is 20/20. I am sure orals were the main factor, but then again, you never know the toll injectables could be taking as well. Especially tren...keep an eye out on that one.

BN is right, I would be willing to bet there are at least a few guys on the boards who are walking around with the same shit and have no idea. That is the scary thing...its like a time bomb ticking just waiting to go off. A lot of people are probably pretty reluctant to post their health problems out in the open, you never know who it si happening to. Please guys, get FULL check ups. Shit, if you have to, lie to the doc that you are having chest pains and they will probably do a CT of your abdomen paid for by your insurance.

Oldfella- thanks for the kind words, and its good to see people like you on the boards with their heads on straight, its wayy too easy to get too caught up in this game.

Pimpman-thanks for the encouragement bro, it is greatly appreciated. I know I will be fine in the long run (I hope at least), but things just seem glum at the moment. Things aren't good for me, but I think they will get better. This situation will help me focus on the more important things now that I sometimes tended to neglect such as God, family, and other relationships (friends) Like I said, I have a whole new perspective. I believe God works in mysterious way and there is a reason for every action he takes in your life. I have many beliefs for him having me go through what I am going through now, but they are personal and I will keep them to myself. It is kinda nice to have some idea of what direction God wants to take you though....it really helps and gives me courage. I will say though...I am not looking forward to my HPTA recovery after not having a break for 15 months. It will be a long hard road I am sure, but I am young, and my nutrition/training is tight, so we'll see.

Tyrone-Thanks for the prayers brother. I just hope this hits home to some people or at least helps people make better decisions.

hey hella you are right god does work in mysteriouse ways.some times bad thing happen to people and they say how can god let this happen to me or if there was a god these kind of things wouln't happen and little do they that if god would of not let that happened something worse would of happened instead.i'm not trying to preach to a chior here but keep you head up you will make it

 

[pimpofny]

good luck bro ...even though it is unfortunate it opened many peoples eyes ...even mine ..thanks

 

[HELLA SWOLE]

Thanks man. I was a complete ass in that previous thread anyway. lol.
So what do the docs think? Is this something that you will have to live with for the rest of your life or will it decrease in size over time? This is a really rare thing here in the states, but I found an article that looked pretty good that you guys might want to read. I think some patients complain of pain and some don't like you've said. Was the doc worrie about this benign tumor turning malignant at some point?

**broken link removed**

They are not 100% sure, but the doc thinks it will go down in size if I stay clean and get healthy. THere are people who live with adenomas inside them their whole life. The doc wasn't really worried about it becoming malignant (at least he didn't seem worried) becasue he explained to me that I was a healthy individual and I took care of myself (besides the gear) and that those types of things don't usually occur in patients like myself. Before he left the room, he looked me in the eye and said "I think you are going to be okay, just stay clean and get healthy"....point taken...