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Is it wrong not to spot


Jun 30, 2002
I have a question for you guys. I go to the gym, I have my head phones on , my cap is pulled down and I hardly never look up and just focus on my workout. It just never fails though that in between sets someone will go out of there way to ask for a spot and 99% of the time I will say no I am sorry I am in between sets. I am always polite never rude about it at least I don't think I am but it always happens and I have seen people walk pass 5 other dudes just to come over and solicit me. I think it is because I am a bigger guy not huge but I did just compete and still look fairly competitive and most of the times it's the bar arm guys that come over.

I really do not have time for small talk as I have a busy schedule and my only purpose is to get my workout in first. My general feeling is I joined my gym for me and my personal goals come first but I was just wondering if you guys say no.
I normally have a very 'intimidating' look on my face due to my concentration, so noone usually bothers me.
BigA-I think its because the 'intimidating look' is attached to a nearly 300lb mass of muscle. LOL!!!!!

Now Im not sure what you are asking bro-but it seems you are asking if anyone says no to spots requests. If thats your situation, you are rushed and dont have any spare time whatsoever, do what you need to do.

Personally I would rarely say no. At most I might get a disguisted look. That would be if someone who I see regularly and never acknowledges me all of a sudden find the ability to speak by asking me to spot him. I enjoy the comarderie of the gym. I hang with the more hardcore crowd-but am friendly with many of the regulars who are not hardcore. Id never say no to these folks any more than Id expect them to brush me off.
Then you have the fitness folks with no gym etiquette who are just in the way (IMO!).

But I can be an asshole too! I had some weird older lady, who
I see there alot and never speaks or says hi, ask me to remove a bunch of 45lb plates from a machine across the gym which I didnt use. I just simply said - NO, you will have to ask someone who works here. And I turned away. All my buddies looked at me like I was nuts, and though I was wrong; but I explained that I wont do shit for someone who would only acknowledge me when they want a favor. :eek:
If it interferes with your workout then whatever it takes

i personally have a hard time saying no and i always appreciate a good spot from someone competent and hate it when none of my bros are around and try to gauge who looks both competent and amicable to taking a moment to give me the spot

but if you do not want to that is your call---especially if doing something like German volume with short rests or something

personally when i am lifting heavy i take long rests so i like something to oocupy my time so i do not rush and i actually can focus as well or better for the set to come
it depends

On how much time I have. I am like MikeS in the fact that I like the gym and the comarderie. I though, find it hard even to turn down someone who rarely if ever acknowledges my presence. I am generally just a nice guy. I like to give everyone a chance at least once. If they screw that up, then they definitely know where they stand with me. lol.
Here is a story.

I am in my 30's and may have less patience than I used to but I still try and be polite when I say no. I had a kid probably 22 or so asked me to spot him on some chins, on this rare ocassion I said ok but he was one that just seemed to single me out and passed a couple of other people to get to me.

He was a bigger kid about 230 looked like he wants to compete maybe kind of thick in pretty good shape. I start to spot him the guy could barely do 4 reps with his own bodyweight and wanted me to spot his shins which I did. I guess he did not like it because he started yelling and saying curse words saying I was not doing it right, I just removed my hand and left him hanging and told him to do it himself.

I took my own free workout time to help you and that is how you show your appreciation? I do not think so, to make a long story short he had a couple of little buds that tried the hard stare when I was not looking anyway when I looked up they would look away.

I guess my thinking is if you can't lift the weight don't try it because I am not your training partner. I pretty much do heavy HIT type training but have less time to reset between sets so those seconds in between are precious recoup time for me and any distractions detracts from my next set.
In that situation..

You did the right thing. I won't waste my time on people who act like dicks when I'm doing them the favor.
Since I work at the gym where I train (at college), everyone knows me. I try to be real friendly when I'm working, and I answer people's questions pretty thoroughly. However when it comes time to train, most of them know not to bother to try to talk to me. Sometimes at the end of the workout I'm less hostile. If someone that is part of the 'elite' group asks me for a spot while I'm working out, I almost always give it, but when idiots bother me I tell them to ask the guy that's working.
The trouble with spotting is that if I am asked I will usually try to do it, however why do people ask the instant you have finished a set of squats or leg press.

What gets me is when I want a spot, the guy either leaves you alone or grabs the bar out of you're hands.
Sometimes I think I need a training partner

Boing "the English_Bulldog"
I only spot people I know anyone else I tell to find someone else I think Im like this because when I first started working out this guy asked me to spot him on flat bench so trying to be nice I did he was only using like 275#'s so he unracks it and does 2 shaky reps then on the 3rd he lowers it and it just completely stopped his face is turning tomatoe red so I pull the weight off him he then jumps up and starts yelling that he could have got it..believe me he couldnt so from that point I was like screw it no more spotting but I am nice about it when asked.
I hate it when my spotter helps me when i could do that one rep. I feel like i want to punch his stupid face then, but i control my angre and never ask this guy to spot again.
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I have the "look" which keeps the newbe's away from me. But i will spot someone who asks at the right time and I know can actually do the wieight they have on the bar. That way I can get the favor returned when i need a spot. But i have no time to chating i will before i start and after for min. but not during.

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