O/T I cheated on my girlfriend

[kingmarc69]

alright guys,I've been on this site for quite awhile but I just read.

Basically I'm in a relationship I love her, we say i love you etc etc.
Thing is im in Vegas shes in CA but I drive down often this is for time being till june or was supposed to be. Any how so I was down there last weekend and everything was good,then she wanted to play with my phone as she went to bathroom i was like ok cool i didn't think much of it. After wards she comes out devastated cause i had been bullshitting on a dating site and she looked at my emails and i had some from girls.I had been on there for a little while not thats its right but I had no intentions of doing anything if was like a retarded hobby when I was bored.

So shits all messed up between us i get home, and first day back im at work long 12 hr shift so i get on my phone an Google my name to see where i have accounts that i made a long time ago when i was single to delete them. Next day i get an email from this site I haven't been on in like a year and its like bikini only pictures,a nurse,smoking..looked like it was fake or some bullshit i was suspicious, she said "hey whatsup your cute etc etc" i emailed back hey what sup blah blah do you have yahoo,at this point i thought it was possible it could have been my girl trying to trick me but still no idea for sure.

So next day get off work and mind you i got on the computer to legitimately delete anything i had if i did right then, i see another email, i read it and its this chick again with her yahoo name so i message her and im bullshitting with her,i didn't know it was my gf yet,but i still thought it was fishy at this point.Im like yea where you work,yea im single,..

So she keeps trying to go on mic with me and webcam and finally im like you know what i have gf i cant talk etc etc.
Then shes like right,uh uhuh right. whatever.

So i get text like a min later saying were fucking done all this shit.

i know i fucked up but is there any recovery at this point.
Suggestions anything.

Also i never physically did anything, not that it matters but..

 

[DicedSix]

The fact that you didn't do anything physical is a mute point. The bottom line is if you could have, you would have.

This belongs in the counseling forum.

It takes years to build trust and only seconds to lose it..

I'm sorry to be harsh bro, but take this as a lesson in life. Next time don't commit yourself or someone else if you are not ready.

 

[number twelve]

dude how did u not realize she was setting you up...your screwed...its prob over so u might as well just tell her that you just do it when your bored and that your really sorry...but good luck esp long distance if u dont have the trust you have nothing

 

[RV63T]

really a retarded hobby cmon u like flirting and talking with these girls. its easy to delete a email and not respond to them. why give out your cell to get text.
your busted and thats it bud.

 

[njpooldude]

hide out for 3 months and then come out with a public "im sorry speech" ??

Sorry bro, but sounds like you really hurt her..... all due respect but how DUMB of you to think it was a real chick emailing you lol

Give her time..space.. maybe she'll forgive you

 

[ssdark1]

id bet $10 that she takes you back

 

[xx0noob0xx]

no good!!

 

[Oldlifter]

I don't really feel qualified to comment on this, due to the fact I'm not a counselor. However, you might want to ask yourself if you really LOVE her. Personally, I wouldn't have been able to play like that, even for fun. When my wife came along, she tore my heart clean out of my chest. I didn't even want to look at another woman, much less entertain one. Just me tho. Are sure you really LOVE her bro? I would make sure of that first, then go from there. I h ope it works out for your best! Best wishes!





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[swm1972]

It takes years to build trust and only seconds to lose it..

That's the cold hard truth right there.

 

[lennoxchi]

ok, all you're stuff aside, what if she had been doing the same thing? you'd probably freak out. i don't blame her actions at this point, if my girl did what you have done then i would have to ask myself if i really want to be with this woman knowing this could happen again.

you live you learn, don't let it happen again. as far as her goes, i'd leave the relationship she's always going to wonder, everytime she sees or hears that you're on the computer, do both of you a favor and move on.

 

[DrivingForward]

Hey Man,

It happens to the best of us. Truth is... THERE IS NO GOING BACK. I made the mistake of doing something like that about 8 years ago... I did something similar, got caught, and tried to work it out with the girl. We dated off and on for like 2 1/2 years after but it was always fucked up. No trust, and she was always acting shady "trying to get back" at me.

Forget her, and go sign up again on the dating sites you just quit.

 

[scrapper13]

technically you didnt cheat, but be honest with yourself you probably would have if you knew you wouldnt get caught...and in that case shes probably not the right girl for you. when you are with the right girl u will have no desire to be with anyone else. we all make mistakes bro, just learn from it and good things will happen.

 

[GymDudeVA]

in the bathroom?!

She wanted to play with your phone WHILE going to the bathroom!? Ew. And "playing" with your phone entails reading your emails? Deal-breakers right there.

 

[J.Blaze]

So much truth in all the previous posts. First off, never ever give a woman your phone...they always look,always!!! Second even if you do work it out with her the trust, which is the most important thing in a relationship, is damaged.Love is a serious thing and I agree with almost all of the above, especially the comment about loving your woman and not even thinking about another. Just move forward and learn from this. So many women out there. Good luck.

 

[Oldlifter]

I'm gonna emphasize my post. there is no way, you can LOVE someone, GENUINELY, and cheat. It's not possible. If you find yourself able too, something is wrong. It just doesn't work that way.

Being that as it may, there are EXCEPTIONS to EVERY rule. However, IMHO, if you do find your in the EXCEPTION category, stop before you go thru, ASK yourself, "Do I really feel this person in my HEART!.



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[SOCOM]

From personal experience, long distance relationships never work...
Even if she forgives you shes always going to have trust issues from this point on. Im not one to deal with all that crap, like someone else said..go back to that dating site and find someone local...

If I were in Vegas I wouldnt be going to dating sites trying to find "A" girl...id be too busy having fun.