Great replies!!!
ya know, this is one of the most debated topics in my field. The suggestion that corporal punishment is barbaric is certainly convincing. Yet all the parents I have seen who do not practice corporal punishment have children that are, as you mentioned, unbearably defiant and rude. Even the children of Developmental Psychologists! I guess I have a few of my own methods, as a parent, not as a doctor that I'd like to share here.
1. Punish the child when the disobedience occurs.
This is important because, like another member said, he had to wait for hours to get his punishment. The waiting was probably as miserable, if not worse, than the actual punishment. If a child's transgression is discovered long after the fact, then a grounding or taking away of privileges should be considered instead (no xbox or phone calls, etc.)
2. Don't use an object to strike the child.
If you do this, then the child begins to fear the object rather than the wielder. You want to keep it between you, the child, and the rule they broke. Leave the weapons out of it. Which brings me to:
3. Don't punish them in public.
It's sufficient to punish the child in private without adding to the punishment the humiliation of everyone seeing that they have been bad. Ever have your boss yell at you in front of your peers?
4. Before, during, and after punishment, reinforce to the child that they are being punished because they acted badly and not that they themselves are a bad person.
I always have a talk and see if my son knows why he was punished. They always do. Then you can give them a hug or otherwise let them know that you love them, whether they break the rules or not but if they do, they have to realize that IT'S YOUR JOB as a parent to be the boss. I always say something like "You know, if I break the rules, I get fired, or pay a fine, or even go to jail so you're not the only one who has rules." This is all part of number
5: Make up with your child.
Don't punish with anger but punish because it's your job as a parent. Make certain that your child knows exactly why you did what you did. Let them know that it was an ACT they committed that caused the events and not they themselves as a person. Make sure they know the difference. You can't slap a kid for having blue eyes. But you can slap a kid if they poke another child in the eye. You don't want to give your child a poor self-image. It's also important to:
6. Reward your child when they behave correctly.
Whatever punishment you give them for bad behavior, see to it that you reward them doubly for correct behavior. When they share, or are compassionate, for instance. But most importantly:
7. BE CONSISTENT.
Don't slap a kid in the head for jumping on the sofa and proceed to jump on the sofa with them the next night. Don't punish them one day for firing a BB gun out the window and then let them slide another time. Even a single inconsistency can set a precedent.
8. Give them options.
Sometimes a disobedient child just needs to know that they have SOME control. For instance, instead of saying "Do you want to go get dressed?" Say "Do you want to wear the blue shirt or the red shirt?" This diverts attention away from the fact that they indeed HAVE to get dressed but still gives them enough authority to let them feel they have a say.
So many parents make the same mistakes over and over again. With a little thought on your part, you can usually avoid the unpleasant scenes and other problems associated with a poorly disciplined child - which, as adults, make up about 90% of my clients.
Take care,
Doc
.gif "IP Gear")
) my mom would ask me if I wanted the bootjack (to be spanked with)! 
