Thanks for all the replies I soaked it all in and maybe now I see that im not the nicest husband when it comes to being understanding. Cause when she doesn't listen I basicly just yell that she dont listen to me so leave me alone. I know im worng but u gotta realize when I come home from working 12 hours im on a totally different page then she is im looking to relax and not have to listen cause I was doimg that all day. But from now on ill take a breath and remember to be the bigger person and just baby her threw. Again thanks guys for reminding me that I suck with woman lmao I was better with one night stands.
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See bold above: It's really easy for all these guys (myself included) to preach how you should treat your wife, but do you really think that everyone here is always following their own advice? Yeah...right. Easier said than done. Most husbands try (with varying degrees of effort), but all will fail from time to time...and most will fail frequently in one way or another.
Since perfection is something you will never attain, the key is to make the right decisions more often than you make the wrong ones...and as time goes by, attempt to improve this ratio in favor of the right.
Ohhh...and be careful how you approach any "counseling" suggestions, as I have seen several people here advise you to recommend counseling. Look, we could "all" use counseling for various reasons, but just because we might benefit from it does not mean we run out and look for a shrink every time we have a problem. The point here is that most wives do not take kindly to being told that they have mental issues requiring professional help, especially post child-birth.
In some instances, such as when a wife suffers from severe post-partum depression, they may indeed benefit from anti-depressant therapy/counseling, but any time a husband tries to tell his wife that her head isn't screwed on straight--which is exactly what you would be doing by telling her she needs to see a phsychologist--you walk a very fine line between finding a possible solution and making the situation worse...and let me tell you, the likelihood of making the situation worse is far greater than making it better.
It would benefit you to learn to distinguish between an issue requiring outside assiatance...and one which does not. For some men, especially those new to marriage or long-term relationships, this can be difficult, as normalacy to a woman can be perceived as craziness by a man. However, just because it may seem like the wifre is acting "crazy", it does not mean she is. They just deal with things differently. This type of discernment will come with time...but I will say this, if we sent our wives to get professional help every time they displayed behavior that seems irrational to us, they would never leave the shrink's office, yet it seems pretty obvious to me that this is not an option, nor is it necessary. The point here is that women do NOT require professional help every time their behavior doesn't seem to make sense. Actually, I would suggest getting used to it...because as long as emotion continues to play an integral role in their decision making process, this type of illogical behavior is here to stay.
Personally, I would advise you to refrain from telling your wife she needs professional help in order to deal with her mental shortcomings. Just because she is self-conscious about her lower belly fat does not mean she requires professional help. The fact that she continues to bring it up in your presence is her way of looking for your re-assurance...re-assuarance that no matter how her stomach looks (or any other part of her), that you will continue to find her beautful, love her, and stick around for the long haul. She is not looking for advice.
All women are self-conscious...to an extreme degree...even the "hot" ones...and guess who is going to bear the brunt of this self-consciousness? YOU! You don't have to understand her needs...and neither do they need to make sense to you, but you will need to meet them if you want to have a happy marriage.