divorce/adultry

[balla06]

im having a huge family problem, and im seeking some answers

if anyone here is a lawyer or knows laws really in the divorce/adultry section please PM me

any help will be GREATLY appreciated

 

[OuchThatHurts]

I went through a custody battle that lasted six years and cost 20 or 30 large. If you're in that hell right now, man, I'm sorry to hear that. balla, I've seen your posts and you've always been legit. Bend my ear if you need to. I know some of the best family law attorneys on the east coast. Most are in DC and a group in Harrisburg. I can certainly give you some names but they are very expensive (don't know what you consider expensive) but a 10k replenishing retainer took a bite out of me with that 2k bill coming every month.

 

[balla06]

I went through a custody battle that lasted six years and cost 20 or 30 large. If you're in that hell right now, man, I'm sorry to hear that. balla, I've seen your posts and you've always been legit. Bend my ear if you need to. I know some of the best family law attorneys on the east coast. Most are in DC and a group in Harrisburg. I can certainly give you some names but they are very expensive (don't know what you consider expensive) but a 10k replenishing retainer took a bite out of me with that 2k bill coming every month.

thanks alot bro i cant say it enough man

its my father goin thru all this along with my sister of 23 my little brother of 13 and myself of 21

im not worried about myself jus my family, id give my life in a heart beat for them and im jsu tryin to do whatever little bit i can to help out, but yes i will def be the key to all this bc it was my boss that she has been fucking for years now and they used me as leway to see eachother and talk all the time and i saw everything first hand, its alot to it all, my mother has never been really a mother, money has driven her whole life and her image and money is what means the most

she even puts it beofre us kids which is sad but its true, but yes ill be all in the middle of it all withthe custody of my little brother, there is gna be alot of mud slingin goin on and alot of hurtful things said but i got to do what is right and my dad is one of the most gentle easy goin men alive and would never hurt a sole unless they messed with his family, and he truly loves my mom, they have been together for 30 years(he was 17 she was 14) and he knows no differnt so its hard for him to acept things and cope wth them but he is gettin better

its jsu sad that there r ppl in this world that would jus walk out on their kids and burn them with fire and try to harm them and take them and their father for everything they have jus bc the other guy has more money and try to rip my little brother from out under him

she is a shitty parent and my dad is by far better then she would ever be, he'd cut of his right arm for us in a heart beat, shed turn her head as we breathed our last breath, this is sad but its no joke she is heartless and she is a demented terriable person, words cant even describe her

 

[TooPowerful4u]

thanks alot bro i cant say it enough man

its my father goin thru all this along with my sister of 23 my little brother of 13 and myself of 21

im not worried about myself jus my family, id give my life in a heart beat for them and im jsu tryin to do whatever little bit i can to help out, but yes i will def be the key to all this bc it was my boss that she has been fucking for years now and they used me as leway to see eachother and talk all the time and i saw everything first hand, its alot to it all, my mother has never been really a mother, money has driven her whole life and her image and money is what means the most

she even puts it beofre us kids which is sad but its true, but yes ill be all in the middle of it all withthe custody of my little brother, there is gna be alot of mud slingin goin on and alot of hurtful things said but i got to do what is right and my dad is one of the most gentle easy goin men alive and would never hurt a sole unless they messed with his family, and he truly loves my mom, they have been together for 30 years(he was 17 she was 14) and he knows no differnt so its hard for him to acept things and cope wth them but he is gettin better

its jsu sad that there r ppl in this world that would jus walk out on their kids and burn them with fire and try to harm them and take them and their father for everything they have jus bc the other guy has more money and try to rip my little brother from out under him

she is a shitty parent and my dad is by far better then she would ever be, he'd cut of his right arm for us in a heart beat, shed turn her head as we breathed our last breath, this is sad but its no joke she is heartless and she is a demented terriable person, words cant even describe her

This does not seem like a hard case to me. Gather every bit of dirt you can on her, be sure to make sure ur lil bro is well aware of the situation and aware of how bad a mother she is and have him testify. I hate when good people are walked on, gets me lit up fierce. Do everything in your power to ruin that bitch's life and make sure she gets away with as little as you can.

 

[balla06]

This does not seem like a hard case to me. Gather every bit of dirt you can on her, be sure to make sure ur lil bro is well aware of the situation and aware of how bad a mother she is and have him testify. I hate when good people are walked on, gets me lit up fierce. Do everything in your power to ruin that bitch's life and make sure she gets away with as little as you can.

thanks for responding bro

and yea im puttin her in the ground and doin every little thing i can, no matter what she is always my mother and the bible says honor thy mother and thy father and i will honor her jus bc of that but she will pay for what she has done

"spill the blood of your own, they shall spill all the blood from you"

with that said she will get all of whats comin to her, karmas a bitch

later on boss man

 

[pimpman]

thanks for responding bro

and yea im puttin her in the ground and doin every little thing i can, no matter what she is always my mother and the bible says honor thy mother and thy father and i will honor her jus bc of that but she will pay for what she has done

"spill the blood of your own, they shall spill all the blood from you"

with that said she will get all of whats comin to her, karmas a bitch

later on boss man

balla hate to see u go through this at ur age but hang tough man let GOD do his will.like u said no matter what she is ur mother good or bad but she is ur mom.

 

[njmuscle66]

I also went through a bitter divorce with a woman that was just NASTY, Vindictive and put her own hostility over what was best for her son. My son was only three at the time but this case is alot different. Since your brother is 13 the court will place a GREAT DEAL of emphasis on who HE would rather be with that is for certain. The adultery might not come into play that much depending on the judge. The courts at least in the cases I have seen tend to just discount it since it is so prevelant. The court will be most concerned with what is in the best interest of the minor child (your brother)-Good luck

 

[balla06]

thanks to all u bros that have responded with any input, i check this thread many times daily jus to see if anyone new has soemthin to offer

i think we r good to go pretty much on gettin my dad custody of my little brother

from what i gather, here in texas its a no fault state, and adlut is not illegal, so with that said we can not put her in jail for it or nothing like that, BUT depending on what kinda judge we get it will play in the custody battle...and if a judge looks at things like jus bc she cheated doesnt mean she isnt a good parent, well ok fine, she is nto a good parent and my sister and i will get on stand and prove it, so i mean her whole case is gan be her tryin to prove and show how shes a good parent to her kids and also try to degrade and tear apart my dad and make him look bad, well with him havin my sister and i on his side backin him up and tellin the truth of how bad a parent she is dotn u think that the court will go in favor with my father? i mean HER OWN 2 OTHER KIDS R SAYIN SHES A BAD PARENT, who else would know better then us? she was OUR mother, ya feel me? i think it will hold up alot, plus alot of her other actions r just pathetic like while my dad at home paying bills shes out drinking and fuckin around on him, also never home to cook a good meal, its always my dad or i doing so. all she does is pay for car insurance and thats bout it, my dad pays all the rest the bills and keeps the hosue together

so with that said and there is alot more i thin my dad should walk with my lil bro

also at his age the court will ask him what parent he would choose but that dont always go with what he wants at his age, if he was 16-17 then he could pick whatever he wants, but at his age he can state who he wants but they still pick the better parent


u knwo whats sad about all this, my father is so heart broken its unreal, well she keeps fuckin with his head sayin she sorry she wants things to work out she will do anything bla bla bla fuckin bla well guess what, he was at a store the other day, well he drove by and saw her car parked in the back of the parkin lot way away from the door to walk in(not normal when ur shopping, u normally want as close to the door as u can) well he sat back and kinda hid his truck far away well he sat there and waited and she never came out, as he was leavin here comes my bosses car rollin up to my mothers car, the passenger door opens, nothinhappens for about 30 seconds, then all the sudden guess who pops out, my slut for a fuckin mother!!! and this is after she has "ended it with him" and promised my lil bro that she would never talk to the man again or see him and swore on her life she would never and after she has ran and played mind games with my dads head, it tookeverythign for him not to fly over there and run up on the dude, if he wasnt onthe phone with me alot of bad shit coulda happen and im glad it didnt bc i need my dad in my life not locked up ya know

also, jsu to add to it. she has no idea that he saw it, we r playin it cool and im playin fuckin mr PI an dwatchin her ass to get pic an shit for evidence to hold up in court so anyways, he plays dumb with her when she gets home, and she says shes been running errands well she has on these brand new gold earings that he has never seen before and shes never had, fuckin sick man fuckin sick, my moms a differnt kinda animal thats for sure

and jsu to show how stupid the bitch is with covering her tracks, she ALWAYS keeps the little jewlery boxes, well my dad found the box and the tag to them in the fuckin trash after she cleaned out her purse


she is so fuckin stupid

ok im done, had to vent a bit

thanks again bros

later on

 

[oldfella]

Hey balla, there is nothing more hurtfull than a cheater. It makes you feel inadequate and angry to say the least. As for custody, you need to prove she would not be a good mother. proving adultry even though not illegal goes a long way to destroying credibility. If she's lied to you how then can she be trusted with the wellfare of a child. If she's out playing the field then how can she raise the child in a careing environment? What, the kids gonna see a different guy come home often. I know this paints a bleak picture but that's what adultry is!! Nasty! I have read a lot of your posts and you are a careing individual with real heart. You certainly do not deserve this on top of other things. And as previous posts say, dig up the dirt no matter how painfull. It will paint her out of the picture. Good luck bro and try to keep your spirits up!! Cheers

 

[balla06]

Hey balla, there is nothing more hurtfull than a cheater. It makes you feel inadequate and angry to say the least. As for custody, you need to prove she would not be a good mother. proving adultry even though not illegal goes a long way to destroying credibility. If she's lied to you how then can she be trusted with the wellfare of a child. If she's out playing the field then how can she raise the child in a careing environment? What, the kids gonna see a different guy come home often. I know this paints a bleak picture but that's what adultry is!! Nasty! I have read a lot of your posts and you are a careing individual with real heart. You certainly do not deserve this on top of other things. And as previous posts say, dig up the dirt no matter how painfull. It will paint her out of the picture. Good luck bro and try to keep your spirits up!! Cheers

thanks alot oldfella! all yall bros seriously make me feel better thru out the day when i come and read somethin yall have to say, even if its not advice its still good to read bc i dotn really vent much to others at all and its good to let things out

anyways, update

parents went out to eat friday night, my mom crys and beggs him to stay with her, she says shes sorry and he is hte only man she loves and she jus wants things to be forgiven and things to be as normal as they can and she wants to save her marriage, she will never ever and swears on her life she wont see the man again and never lie and never ever do anything like this again. and that she will change her ways and contribute more as a wife and a mom and she is soooo sorry bla bla bla. well kinda twisted with my dads head i mean whos head wouldnt it fuck with when u been tog for 30 fuckin years but anyways

here is the good part of it all, my dad leaves with my little brother early saturday morning to head to the deer lease so my mom has the house ot herself. well she drives around the hood lookin for houses to buy or rent so we follow her around

then we get soemthin to eat so we lose her, she goes to the mall way downtown, so we go and watch her car and wait for her to come out. we sit there for 4 and half hours waiting on this bitch to come out, well here comes a black benz s500 in the distance so i get ready to take pics and video, sure enough the bitch gets out my bosses car and gets into hers and they leave and she goes home and he goes home

i tried to call her while we were sitting watchin her car jus to play stupid with her, well she never calls back so later on that night after she has been home for a bit she calls me and says sorry she has been at my neighbors helpin with some decorations and her phone has been on the charger in her truck the whole time, WHAT THE FUCK EVER!! such a lyin ass bitch man, shits so crucial

not even 24 hours later of tellin my dad all that shit shes out fuckin the dude again

she is one heartless bitch guys if i could explain and say everything shes done yall would throw up in ur mouth, shes a sick ass person

and out of all this crap, i have enough shit on my mom to put her away inthe fed pen for a few years, but i jus cant seem to bring myself to do that to her

if she doesnt leave my father alone the table will turn soon tho


aright im outty

peace bros

thanks again for every thing guys

 

[OuchThatHurts]

balla,

Sounds like a truly dysfunctional situation and from what you've said and even left out, you have every right to be angry. Keep venting because I think it's good for you. I do want to say though that this is your biological mother right? If not, forget everything I'm about to say.

It sounds like your mother may have very serious problems - mental, physical, whatever. Now the things she has done and is doing are things you have every right to be angry with. It sounds to me like this is between your father and her. Somehow, you got caught in the middle of a situation that isn't really about your relationship with your mother directly, but rather is affecting your relationship with your mother through the things she is doing to your father.

If what you have said is all true than your mother needs help and is ill. Illnesses always affect the people around the ill person. Especially the loved ones. You only get one mother in life and for better or worse, this is the one that you were given. Like I said, it's good that you're expressing your anger as well you should but many of these things are being said out of anger and I hear very little concern for the fact that she is you mother and she is in serious trouble. That should hurt you. When people get hurt, they get angry and is totally understandable.

You do not know how all of this will turn out in the end but one thing is for sure is that, in time, you need to express your feelings and the way her actions hurt you in a calm and peaceful manner.

Right now, your father should be taking the steps necessary to continue on with his life in a peaceful and enjoyable fashion. You should perhaps stand back for a while and let him do that for himself. You may be best friends but sometimes even our friends have to be left to their own methods of dealing with a horrible situation such as your describing. In the event that this arrives in front of a judge, which seems inevitable, then you can play a vital role in backing your father and friend.

In the meantime, be careful what you do with your mother. They day may come when she has straightened out her life and wants to try to reestablish some sort of relationship (whatever it may be) with you. What will you do then? Are you burning your bridges with no hope of ever getting that back?

Are you 100% sure that you never want to have another thing to with her ever. When you were born, she suffered through your birth. She nursed you through your childhood. You cried in her arms. Remember? She's very sick right now.

You're feelings are 100% justified and you do whatever you think is best for you bro. But in the interest of HOPE, leave that door open just a crack. The years are coming when she won't be doing the things she is now. She's going to be an elderly lady somewhere who gave birth to you. You are entwined in that respect.

Take care my brother and you do what you need to stay healthy in every way. You're disgust for your mother's actions may not be the same as your feelings for as a person and your mother. Certainly everyone will understand whatever you do. It's obvious from this thread that people care about you. You have your father, mother, family, and some true friends along the way. That's about it. Cherish them. Just don't go down with them.

Keep venting away my friend but eventually after your anger subsides....

Thanks for letting the members here see your feelings on this. It's difficult to probably even think about let alone write about. Good for you! We'll be here.

In all things, Peace bro.

OTH

 

[balla06]

balla,

Sounds like a truly dysfunctional situation and from what you've said and even left out, you have every right to be angry. Keep venting because I think it's good for you. I do want to say though that this is your biological mother right? If not, forget everything I'm about to say.

It sounds like your mother may have very serious problems - mental, physical, whatever. Now the things she has done and is doing are things you have every right to be angry with. It sounds to me like this is between your father and her. Somehow, you got caught in the middle of a situation that isn't really about your relationship with your mother directly, but rather is affecting your relationship with your mother through the things she is doing to your father.

If what you have said is all true than your mother needs help and is ill. Illnesses always affect the people around the ill person. Especially the loved ones. You only get one mother in life and for better or worse, this is the one that you were given. Like I said, it's good that you're expressing your anger as well you should but many of these things are being said out of anger and I hear very little concern for the fact that she is you mother and she is in serious trouble. That should hurt you. When people get hurt, they get angry and is totally understandable.

You do not know how all of this will turn out in the end but one thing is for sure is that, in time, you need to express your feelings and the way her actions hurt you in a calm and peaceful manner.

Right now, your father should be taking the steps necessary to continue on with his life in a peaceful and enjoyable fashion. You should perhaps stand back for a while and let him do that for himself. You may be best friends but sometimes even our friends have to be left to their own methods of dealing with a horrible situation such as your describing. In the event that this arrives in front of a judge, which seems inevitable, then you can play a vital role in backing your father and friend.

In the meantime, be careful what you do with your mother. They day may come when she has straightened out her life and wants to try to reestablish some sort of relationship (whatever it may be) with you. What will you do then? Are you burning your bridges with no hope of ever getting that back?

Are you 100% sure that you never want to have another thing to with her ever. When you were born, she suffered through your birth. She nursed you through your childhood. You cried in her arms. Remember? She's very sick right now.

You're feelings are 100% justified and you do whatever you think is best for you bro. But in the interest of HOPE, leave that door open just a crack. The years are coming when she won't be doing the things she is now. She's going to be an elderly lady somewhere who gave birth to you. You are entwined in that respect.

Take care my brother and you do what you need to stay healthy in every way. You're disgust for your mother's actions may not be the same as your feelings for as a person and your mother. Certainly everyone will understand whatever you do. It's obvious from this thread that people care about you. You have your father, mother, family, and some true friends along the way. That's about it. Cherish them. Just don't go down with them.

Keep venting away my friend but eventually after your anger subsides....

Thanks for letting the members here see your feelings on this. It's difficult to probably even think about let alone write about. Good for you! We'll be here.

In all things, Peace bro.

OTH

damn man i wont lie that kinda brought tears to my eyes

to answer ur questions yes she is my real mother

and even tho all of this is goin on and shes at fault liek u said she is my mother and the only one i will ever have and NO ONE can ever take that place in my life no matter what she or i or anyone does, i love my mother no matter what she does but liek u said we r all in disgust and angry

thru all of this, i will never turn my back on my mother if she needs help, no matter what she has done to me my father and my family id still give her my last breath jus so she could breath one more breath then i and give her that last second of life longer then me, id cut off my arm and give it to her if she needed it but what she is missing is a heart and ive tried to talk to her and ive told her all of this

the first thing i told her when this all first came out is that i love her and nothing can change that no matter what and if she ever needed me then id be there to help in a heart beat, even after all that said she STILL continues to lie to me about everything and even after she stumbles in her own lies and i catch her and the truth comes out she still lies about other things, does my mother need help mentally? i dotn really think so at all. she knows what she is doing and she plays games and uses things to her advantage

she has issues no doubt but its nothin that she cant control. i know my mom and how she works and its all sad and seems liek no one could ever be the way she is but she is that way. she cares bout herselfand willuse any excuse, advantage she can for herself, even as far as her making statement of killing herself. when she did that i stepped back and was concerned for her bc i dotn want that none of my family does and i comfort her and talked to her on a dif level even with all this goin on. she wuld never hurt herself she says things liek that to make ppl feel sorry for her, thats how she works. she is indeed a sick ind and does need help but tis not a problem she cant control and fix herself. its that she DOESNT WANT to. she thinks she is playin everyone in my family and hs the upper hand on everyone and is gettin away with murder like she has time and time and time again, well this time she wont im behind her every move and all these toughts and judgemets we have made and accustations we have came up with bout how she truly might be, im proving that we were right all along. i got pic, voice recordings etc of her talkin bout it. her plan is to milk my father for everything she can and take whatever she can and then when my old bosses son graduates high school in a year him and her will run off together, but he wont leave his wife bc he wants his kid to not go thru it all and be away when it all goes down. his wife has been told but she simply says she doesnt believe it, owell thats fine she doesnt have to and if she wants to be blind about it all she will realize it all in a year or 2 when he comes up and tells her he wants a divorce

this man is buyin my mother a house to stay in right now but she is tryin an dthinks shes playinit off as her jsu moving out givin my dad his space for now so they can take soem time to breathe, and in that time for them to breathe she is gna continue to milk him and take everything she can from under him. i got all thsi on tape and on film etc

im everywhere shes at so i see it all

its sad that i have to do this but my dad is weak bc he loves her, he knows what he needs to do he is jus tryin to find it in his heart and figure out how he wants to do it, thats where i step in bc he aske dme too bc he emotionally is wrecked and if he sees soemthin he will most likely do soemthin that doesnt need to be done

i would never do anything that would seriously hurt my mother but i will make sure that justice is served to her for what she has done

if she hates me then thats her call but i never will shut her totally out

she made her bed she needs to sleep in it

thansk for the response OTH means alot bro! and thanks for all the kind words, yall bors r doing more then u kno wby jus writting inhere to me

my dads comes home tonight and we r gna talk to him and show him all the pics and videos of this weekend and go from there

i will keep u posted

thaks again bros

 

[OuchThatHurts]

Storytime from the Ouch Couch...

I know this must be difficult for you balla. Let me share a story with you, with all of you, which happened to me a few years ago. It’s perhaps different from your situation, balla, but rather than discuss the differences, I’ll let the story speak for itself, okay?

Perhaps five, maybe six years ago, not long after I was granted my PhD, I had a very tough situation. I had just started my career a few years prior and this situation fell into my lap and I’ll admit, I was quite unready for it.

There came a brother and later his sister to my office and after discussing their respective situations at length, I was finally able to make sense of everything and try some therapies with them - first separately and then together. Their mother's behavior was very similar to what you describe, balla. In the beginning, she cheated on their father. She tore the family apart. She abused her friends. She became more and more self-centered and abusive to her relationships. Over the course of many years, she had alienated herself from her children (the brother and sister), her husband and then finally even her own family as well. In return, they said and did terrible things to this woman. They called her on the phone in the middle of the night and tormented her and many other similar things because she had hurt them and everyone around her so completely and so utterly that they hated, if fact, despised her. As it does, time when on, and the mother kept alienating herself from her family and all the more they tortured her to every degree they could. They were hurt and angry and they were doing these things to get back at her.

The woman grew older and one day began to lose vision in her left eye. She took herself to the hospital and after the entire range of tests was completed, she was diagnosed with an malignant and inoperable brain tumor. This tumor had likely been there for years with her behavior as the only symptom that something was wrong. Of course, acting selfish and alienating oneself from your family and friends hardly warrants a visit to the doctor right? At any rate, the malignant tumor had eaten so much of her brain that she died not long after and in fact, quite suddenly.

They didn't even attend her funeral as they had so lost touch with her that she was buried in a public cemetery and it was good news as far as they were concerned. She was finally gone. When the children went to get her things, the landlord of the building told them what had happened. They followed up with her doctors and now they knew that their mother had been ill for a very long time. They had no idea. How could they? Shortly after all this unfolded is when they arrived in my office. First, the son arrived and then the sister and finally, the ex-husband (father). What they felt was horrible guilt for the things they had done to her. None of them could get over the fact that it was likely her illness that caused her eccentric behavior.

Now they knew.

They had never said goodbye nor said they were sorry. They weren't there for her when she was hospitalized nor were they there when she died or was buried. They remembered well then all the things they had done but had no way to ask for forgiveness since the mother was now gone! They were, all of them, falling apart in their own lives wracked by this horrible feeling of guilt and shame. The daughter said she felt she'd driven her to her grave. Despite their anger for the things their mother and wife did, they still loved her. What were they to do? Many tears fell that year. I sat and listened to them talk about all the good times and things they remembered and how terrible they were to her in the end. It was a horrible situation. I myself lay awake at night, wondering what to do. No textbooks could correct this problem. There was no pill, no therapy that I knew of.

I discussed this with my mentor. He was, and still is, an old guy but sharp as a fox. He listened carefully and we discussed many approaches. Eventually, the tears and the discussions, the therapies began to have an effect and although it was to hurt them for the rest of their lives, they were finally moving on.

One evening, I grabbed the keys to the company van and drove them over to her grave. I sat in the van as I watched them sobbing and crying together, holding each other. I sat and watched and could almost see their minds coming to the realization that what they had right there was what mattered most in life: love. They loved each other and they loved their mother. Not a word was spoken on the drive back into the city and I didn't offer up any conversation that afternoon.

A month later they all came to me and after some hugs and handshakes they told me that they had her moved her to their family plot on the other side of town to be buried with their grandfather and grandmother. In death, they had accepted her back into their fold as a wonderful part of their own healing process. They came up with that on their own. I had never suggested the notion to any of them.

I saw very little of them as time went on and eventually not at all. I assume they all began their lives anew with a rekindled sense of love for all those around them in whom they placed their love and affection. Healing had taken place and I was fortunate enough to have been there to see it with my own eyes. Now I share it with all of you.

In conclusion, we should all take care to protect ourselves but at the same time, be very careful of the bridges you burn and the doors you slam shut. Sometimes those bridges and doors can never be crossed or opened again.

 

[balla06]

damn.....

thats some rough stuff OTH!! and that is somethin i hope never happens in my family and IF it were then i wouldnt be bc i shut her out and i wont call her everyday and do all that stupid shit i jus want what needs to happen to happen and that is her leavin my dad alone and just gettin her things and movin else where and lettin time heal things and better herself and then with that time things will have healed and ppls temper/anger will have died down some and then we can all talk in a civil manner

OTH thanks alot for ur help brutha, im sure u get paid for all ur advice and u take time to come here and write and talk to me jus bc ur a good bro, i cant thank u enough man

my father came here and talked to us today and he couldnt stop crying and to see him cry KILLS me inside, i showed him the pics i got and the video and it ripped his chest even more. he wrote my mother a letter bc that is the best way he can describe himself and get all his feelings out propper. he is going to give it to her tomorrow night and confront her with all this. my little brother has TAAS testing shit tom and my dad doesnt want his head anywere else but focused on school and the test

god his is some rough shit, seeing ur dad that has been so macho and never shed a tear infront of u his whole life and always been the strong one and always able to make things better and seem to figure out the right things be so weak and destroyed inside

i shame my mother for doing this so much its unreal, tom night is gna be a real rough night for me again, prolly one o fthe roughest nights of my life besides the night it all came out and my whole family confronted her

as far as my old boss, i dotn care what happens to his ass, he will get his, karma is a bitch these days and god will have his way with him. ima go after him the legal way as much as i can i jus dont know if there is anything that i can sue him for but i got to figure out somethin bc his money and his image r his most precious things and i want to destroy both as much as i can

thanks again OTH

off to watch a movie

peace
balla

 

[oldfella]

First, OTH, what a story man. It is cruel what we do to each other. I mean like you said, who the hell would have known. We are such fragile beings. We try to toughen up our exteriors by building a sheath of armor around us, but we are still so fragile. I have to give huge credit to you. It is obvious that you do care!! If you didn't you would not have sleepless nights worrying about others and thier plight. I can see you also need to share your thoughts and feelings to remain sane!! It is a certain sensitivity that does bind us all together. You are 1 in a million. Your stories always touch the softest spot in my soul. Please keep posting and shareing with us.

Balla my bro, Like OTH said, let it all out brother. Keeping it inside will wreck you, then the demons have won!! Hate, anger, fear it is all in your posts and you need to get it out. Out of all the anger in your words I feel LOVE, cause you care. The love is always there. if it were not you would not put this up here and ask for help and guidance. You only have one mother, Love her for she is like no other. OTH's story is an eye opener. We are all to quick to draw conclusions, conclusions that can eventually lead to total disaster. Do not let this happen to you. Yes bro I believe in Kharma. It is a force that follows us all through life. When the bad out weighs the good then the bad Kharma comes after you. Your boss will get his. Do the right thing and you will see. Do not let the anger consume you, it will if you let it. Life is too short and all so precious, don't waste it on hate. Vent it out of your life and replace it with good. Do not forget you are human, I often have to pull myself back into the reality of this. I used to walk around with anger and hate inside me, it took me to places I never would have gone, dark, empty, lonely places filled with demons trying to pull you deeper into the void. It was scarry and still frightens me to this day. I'm sure I still carry a demon or two around but they do not rule my destiny. One day I will post up my story of the dark side of my life that is now well behind me. I do not want to HIjack YOUR thread my bro. But we all have a dark side I'm sure. I will ask OTH if it's all good one day, one day when I'm ready. I'm sure everything will work out for you Balla. Be patient and be smart. Think before you leap brother. It's a long way to fall. All the best and GOd BLESS!!

 

[balla06]

so everything went down, the cops came and everything, fuckin worst night of my fuckin life

i want nothing to do with my mother for the longest time and i hope that she has not cut my heart so deep that i will never forgive her bc i really dotn want that but she is making her own choices

i reached out and BEGGED her to give me her love and be honest with me and stop turning her back on me i begged her i cried i told her i wanted her there for everything in my life when i get married when i ask my gf to me marry me when i have my first kid and all the others after but most of all i wanted her love and she fuckin turned her back to me and had nothing to say

she needs soem fuckin help bc i dotn NO ANYONE else in the world that could do that to their own flesh and blood. things got good for just a second bc my dad went and got a lawyer and he is goin thru with all thsi then she has to come and fuck shit up again

and the lawyer told my dad their wasnt much he can do and that her character wont be bad to them unless she is a drug addict WTF that is insane, HOW IS SHE A GOOD FUCKIN MOTHER IF SHE TURNS HER BACK TO HER OWN "FAVORITE" SON WHEN HE ASK FOR HER LOVE?? what kinda fuckin mother is that and what kinda stupid fuckin ppl would give a 13 yr old child to a person liek that? plus on top of all the other shit she has done. thsi si fuckin ridiculous!!!!

i got to go after ths stupid fat sorry fuck the legal way i need to figure out how to do this shit, i want every penny i can from him and most of all i jsu want him to fuckin look me in the eyes so he can see the painandhurt he has caused and also see such a cold ass look from me that will haunt him for the rest of his life

if he doesnt pay and if she gets custody over my father i will lose it i will fuckin straight lose it

god this shit sucks

i hate them both for doing this but most of all im hurt and my family is hurt. i watched them all cry so much last night and not jsu tears fuckin screaming crying shaking crying adn i sat back and watched it and tried to hold up and be strong for my family but i lost it i had enough last night all this hurt is turning into anger and its all gna turn into revenge

thsi sorry fuck has told my mom he is scared shitless of me and is having his house watched and cant sleep at night if i do anything he will have me thrown in jail, fuck him, bouncing his head off the fuckin concreate a few times will be WELL worth a couple nights in county

god this shit really sucks its liek my heart has been pulled from my chest and crushed infront of my own eyes BY MY OWN MOTHER, THE LADY WHO GAVE BIRTH TO ME!!

fuck them both and i hope he burns in hell and maybe ill see him in hell fuck him and everything he is about


sorry guys im real sorry this is just so fuckin hard

im out

 

[balla06]

Aflicted Past-Hatebreed

Hatred evokes the memories that make your blood run cold. Fear and sorrow
push you away from yourself.

[chorus]

How can you face the world? When you
can't face the mirror. How can you leave your past? With blood on your
hands? Can you run away all your life? Can you escape your punishment? How
many times can you start it all again? How many lies will it take to cover
your tracks?

[chorus]

Mo matter how far you go Those days are right behind.
The facade of your perfect life. Cannot hide your perfect past. There is no
escape.





dedicated to my mother

 

[oldfella]

Hey Balla, I can feel your anger here. It's ok bro. We all have these emotions. It is only when you let the emotions govern your actions that will lead to pain. The wrong kind of pain. You are doing really well to come here and vent it out. Keep doing this! I know OTH is lurking and will offer his wisdom and education to this. But I have had and still do have the anger and hate inside me from the past, it is the same anger you are feeling now! Ok, lets break it down, your anger is a natural emotion caused from an outside source. This being the family matters confronting you. Dealing with this is a matter of take some deep, deep breaths and take stock of things. Being rejected, especially by your mother is probably one of the worst hurts that can be inflicted on anyone. I truely feel for you bro. She is your mother, you will always love her. I'm sure she does harbor love for you and the family. She just can not deal with it. So you need to, you need to keep the love there not only for yourself but for the rest of the family. You need to be strong for them, then cry with them, try to comfort them and in turn you will find some peace for you. As for "The Fat Fuck", time will fix him. You can not be strong for your family from the slam, got it! You can make him feel fear but the minute you touch him, he has won. It's good that he fears you. He will make mistakes then. When he makes the mistakes it is then you pounce, you capitalise on his mistakes but DO NOT TAKE MATTERS INTO YOUR OWN HANDS!! You do not want that. The rage you feel will destroy what sanity you have left, do not let it consume you. You are a good man Balla. You have so much love in you, so much love for your family, LOVE conquers all. Good will always triumph over evil! It is love that binds the family together and hate that tears it apart. It is OK to feel what you are feeling, it is not OK to act out your revenge and hatred on another. The law will not care about the circumstances that brings you before it for judgement, only the deed you have done! Like you said, fix him up the legal way, get some good advice and follow it! Take your anger and channel it to work for you. Hit the gym hard and smash the weights into oblivion so it makes you stronger and harder, then you have won! I have always found solice in the gym when in times of need. Iron has been my saviour from the reaches of hell as has been my faith! You always have us bro. We will be your strength when you need it, we wil pick you up when you're down. DO NOT LET THE DEMONS WIN!! Keep venting and get it out of you. You are a GOOD MAN BALLA, let no one take this away from you. Be Well and GOD BLESS!

 

[balla06]

alright guys

first off i jus wanna say thanks for all the help and support u all have gave me thru all this i truly have a place i love to come to and hang out on. i wish someday i meet some of u guys on here and be able to kick it and bullshit with u all

i wrote my mother a letter bc i seem to get everything out better that way

so guys ima say this, i have made my closure to all this im prolly never gna figure out the answers to what i need to know bc she will prolly never tell me. i hope she can live with what she has done and i hope god and her meet and she finds soem warmth in her blood and changes her life around. until then i wish her the best in everything and if she every needs me bc shes dying or seriously hurt ill be there in a heart beat without questions asked


she has deeply cut my heart but its time for me to let it heal bc things will only get worse if i dont. ive tried everything i know to try and ive done everything i knwo to do. there is no more i can do. she has to find herself and no one can do that but her. its sad to here and see and actually live thru somethin like this but no matter what NO one can ever bring me downa nd make me fall. id carry the weight of the world on my back and walk the universe a thousand times over before anyone brought me down. it does hit home real real real deep when its ur own mother that does these things but everyone of us live our own life and make r own choices in life and we have to live with those choices,no one else. all i can do now is get on with my life, take care of my father and my family and keep on makin my place in life and take care of what need be for my future. im 21 boutto be 22 and im at a critical part of my life bc in 5 years my life is gna be a drastic change and im gna be married prolly have kids etc, i need to get back on track of buildin my foundation for all of that

on the other hand i need to get my ass back in the gym i have not been in bout a month or so, hardly eat hardly do shit anymore except try to work this problem in my head. well i finally figured out the answer, there is nothin i can do now, so its time i get my ass back in the groove of shit!!!


later on bros and thanks again for all the help and the talks!! ill keep postin here with my progress on all this and stuff and how the divorce plays out

later on brutha!