I'm 23 she is 40...it just happened....HELP

[BreitlingGT]

So ill give you some back ground info aka the story....So July of 09 I was at Secrets in OCMD went out alone as my current gf at the time wasnt coming to my beach house until saturday and it was wed...So i went out just looking to hang out and get out enjoy the summer...Long story short at the end of the night I see this blonde that was super hot she made eye contact and smiled, I smiply smiled back then turned my back to her and kept listening to the band ....payed her just about zero attention...so about 10mins later I feel a tap on my shoulder and bam its her...so we had a short 5 min conversation and she asks me to come back to her place.... so we get back to her place talk for about 2 mins start kissing and long story short hooked up...so I asked her how old she was after and she said well.......I'm 39....At the time i didnt care at all....she told me she doesnt give her number out so when i went to leave she told me it was becuase she is married...so i said i guess ill see ya if i see ya...she replys ill see ya tom I put my number in your phone...So now its almost 2 years later my gf and i split up June of 2010 and she left her husband Aug of 2010...We couldnt really control it we had an instant connection were best friends and totally happy....She has a Son who is 5 who has become my best bud when I see him....So my delemmia is what do I do she view our realtionship as it possibly going some where talks about wanting to live with me ect ect...I dont know what I want..I love her but i feeel like i may want a kid and family of my own one day....my parents love her but only think she is 32 not 40! What do i do......Its tearing me up...Im so happy but then I start to think about the situation and i sway back and fourth!!!! And for the majority of you that will not think she is hot or this is all a lie or story.....ill post pics!

 

[dukkitdalaw]

Ive been in your shoes.

And I say... if youre happy... go for it.

But if you have alot of doubts, as seen by this thread... then in the long run, it probably wont work out.

Mine didnt.

 

[BreitlingGT]

I dont think in the long long run it will work out....but for now its fun...she left a marriage that was extreamly lavish....so i have some nice toys ...She takes very good care of me its just a rock in a hard place...

 

[tri-terror]

Age ain't nuttin but a number man. Besides its not like she's a old lady.
Your parents know you and her better than us, so I think your first move should be coming clean about her age and asking their advice.
She can still have kids at 40, but time may be short. You need to decide if kids is a deal breaker or not, and then talk to her and are where she stands.

Good luck, and listen to your heart. There are not many people that can make you truly happy. Is she one?

 

[BreitlingGT]

Here is 2 pics she is the blonde.

 

[dukkitdalaw]

yeah... I say you stay with her as long as possible. If she starts trying to make it more serious... change the discussion or brush it off.

Then when you cant possibly push it any further... leave her.

For now... use her. lol

 

[lennoxchi]

if you're happy then whats the issue? oh yea, she 40 and wants stability like most women who are that age and have a kid, well, can't blame her, if that's not what you want then bail.

btw, what is it that you want?

 

[BreitlingGT]

I provide stability I and want to be with her just worry about when I want a kid of my own what the he'll I'm gonna do....She is fully aware of my concerns.

 

[lennoxchi]

I provide stability I and want to be with her just worry about when I want a kid of my own what the he'll I'm gonna do....She is fully aware of my concerns.

she not willing to have another child?

 

[Jello]

You don't see it working in the long run then break it off. It's not fair to the kid, I know, I was that kid before.

 

[BreitlingGT]

She is willing but I'm in anesthesia school and I'm not ready for a kid I have things I want to do.....I have spent years in school and just want to be able to breath she is willing and wants to have a baby with me...she doesnt want to do anything without me...at times it can almost be annoying..but she is a great girl so I cant complain...

 

[BreitlingGT]

The kid has a dad I do not in any way shape or form try to play dad he has the assumption that im moms friend and he enjoys coming to my house and hanging out and all but he has a very good dad and doesnt look at me in the role...

 

[Quadriceps]

I can't give you any good advice, but think about this.

When you're 40 and could be bangin women in their 20's and 30's she'll be 60! And that only applies if you're thinking about dating her long term. But if you love her that might not matter to you, just wanted to throw this out here.

Good luck.

 

[richiec]

Good luck, and listen to your heart. There are not many people that can make you truly happy. Is she one?

Don't "listen to your heart" as we have wicked "hearts".

If you don't think it's going to work out in the long run, then why even continue? It will fail if you think it will. If you have any intentions of this becoming serious, than buck up. Otherwise, find someone who is a bit younger and has a biological clock that isn't winding down. If you stay with her and don't have children bc she can't and want to, you will blame her down the road and that won't turn out good

 

[shortyshort]

and do keep in mind, when ur 40 shes more like 80... n 40 is young for a man. but not for a woman..

being a dildo is cool but being a sucka is not cool...

be cool my friend

 

[Designbuilt]

I've been there... When I met my ex-wife she was 38, I was 25... I was instantly attracted to her, she was exactly my type, white skin, black hair, pinup girl figure and dressed classy, since she was zoning attorney and I honestly thought she was my age, 30 at most... But we met at City hall...

Everything was perfect at first, we worked out together, our sex life was great, she was great...
Then I had problems with her ex-husband, since her kid liked me more, because he'd never visit them, he suddenly started coming around a lot more...

Then he tried to regain custody, it was a lot of crap and costs me in the neighborhood of 200K in attorney fees! and took about 4 years and 95 court dates... 95! NINETY FIVE!! He had me arrested for assault, (because he's a fireman and has connections with cops)

I had a building of his taken away and torn to the ground... (I'm an architect and have connections with building inspectors) Then I stopped working out (took 7 years off) and started drinking, smoking and etc...

Regardless, we got through it, fine... We both ended up pretty bruised up from all of that shit, while making the attorneys a good sum of money...




Lets say that the above won't apply to you:


The major problems started with our sex life, she was great (at first) we'd do it five times/day or so, if I wanted... Then about ten years later, I still wanted to go twice/day, It even somehow got back to my brother that I was still like that, but that's just how I am, always have been... She told her friends, who told my brother's gf and that's just bullshit... I was lucky to get it twice/ week...

Then she started going through menopause at about age 47-48 and that was the end of her sex drive, she didn't want me to touch her and urged me to get a gf even if we didn't divorce... Once we finally did divorce (we remain good friends and she's a great mom) I started dating a 26 year old like I was meant to...

As far as your girl is concerned, she seems as if she's not completely trust worthy (she cheated on her husband)

So in a few years once she's bored with you, or you get on her nerves, what's to stop her from doing the same to you?

That's getting personal, but whatever, it's my opinion and wish you luck, but as a good friend told me, it's better to break it off sooner than later, because the longer it goes on, the tougher it'll be for you and the kid... (it's not his fault)

The above is just my own experience with an older woman and perhaps your appetite isn't as high as mine is, maybe the same won't happen, but those are things I experienced and hope they open your eyes to some possibile outcomes...

 

[phreak]

i say enjoy yourself bro, and see if that other cougar in the pic there wants to do a threesome

you're young- enjoy the experience for what it is. DON'T get her pregnant and live it up if she is willing to sponsor you. i'm not saying you should play with her heart, hell you should be honest with her and let her know that you are too young to be thinking seriously. this doesn't mean that you cannot be committed to her, it just means DON'T FUCK UP AND GET LOCKED IN WITH A CHILD.

you will both move on one day. until that day comes, reap the benefits of the situation, the same way she is.

 

[razorsedge]

i say enjoy yourself bro, and see if that other cougar in the pic there wants to do a threesome

you're young- enjoy the experience for what it is. DON'T get her pregnant and live it up if she is willing to sponsor you. i'm not saying you should play with her heart, hell you should be honest with her and let her know that you are too young to be thinking seriously. this doesn't mean that you cannot be committed to her, it just means DON'T FUCK UP AND GET LOCKED IN WITH A CHILD.

you will both move on one day. until that day comes, reap the benefits of the situation, the same way she is.

This is the answer right here bro...live it up and try to wear that thing out but...no commitment. The kid will get over it ...let us know how the 3 way went too

 

[Nssca]

Let her move in...
Let her kid move in too..
Have fun,laugh,love, live BUT...

DO NOT EVER Marry this woman. Why? ask her husband...
Do not get her Pregnant. Why? Ask her husband.

You do what you want... just don't get tied down to this woman.
She cheated once...Why not again?

 

[j8282]

It would be hard not to wanna see her everyday, she is beautiful and doesn't look her age. Just be upfront with her and try not to get attached to the kid. I think this will be the hardest part, kids just tend to do that to ya.